Triggering (SI/Sexual Abuse) - So scared.....

nuttybabe07 · 11-02-2009, 09:44 PM

I fell so tearful and scared and have such a strong urge to self harm or take an overdose. I want to cry and cry but i cant and i dont know why. The guy that touched me a few weeks ago now knows where i live and im scared he is coming to get me. He said he would come after me and hinted that it could be in march. I cant talk about it to anyone, not police, staff at hospital, therapist, friends, no one. I cant or he will hurt me even worse and that isnt just a threat he made, he WILL hurt me worse. I cant talk about it or tell anyone apart from people on here and i am so sorry to burden you all with this. I just dont know what else to do. I cant cope with this fear. Im at my wits end.

Steph

melda · 11-02-2009, 10:53 PM

Sorry to hear you're in this situation, and I cant say that I know what you're going through. I know it may seem really bad if you told someone because then the guy would find out, but if the police are involved, then he couldnt hurt you if he was behind bars. But if you feel that you really cant talk to anyone, then keep talking to us on here about how you're feeling and whats going on.

Take care

inblack · 12-02-2009, 01:00 AM

I know you are scared and likely have good reason to be. However, in most cases when someone threatens to hurt or kill you if you tell someone, it won't happen. He may even mean exactly what he says, but again like I said, in most cases it still doesn't happen.

I think you need to get some professional advice on this matter. If you feel there is a chance you could be hurt again then you NEED to get the police involved. Plus he may do this again to someone else. You need to be strong for you and for other potential victims.

What I would recommend is calling a crisis line and obtaining some advice and help from them. They can guide you through the process of going to the hospital and to the police. You can also go straight to the emergency room and they can help you. Here in Canada you can go to the hospital and get help and tell them what happened and they will not force you to go to the police. I don't know what the laws are where you are, but its likely you can go to emergency and obtain help without having to go to the authorities, but I highly recommend you get the police involved.

Again I know you're scared, but you need to do this.

nuttybabe07 · 12-02-2009, 02:24 AM

the thing is, im already not on good terms with the police, (long story, not due to crimes or anything) so i really feel unable to go to them for help. I feel stuck.

inblack · 12-02-2009, 03:42 AM

Is there a trusted adult you could tell? A parent, relative, or teacher maybe?

The police should help you whether or not you are on good terms with them and I still recommend telling them whats going on for your own safety.

I really wish I could offer more advice but I really don't know what else you could do :(

-Asphyxia- · 12-02-2009, 04:00 AM

*hugs*

Please, please, PLEASE contact your local rape crisis center at the very least. They will be able to help you as far as handling this goes...There are ways that they can help you in the process of dealing with authorities, and often you can get an "advocate," or someone from the center who will be with you through it all.

Please call, and if you don't know a number, google or call RAIN and they'll direct you to the proper help.

I also know of a good website that has plenty of info. and support about things like this, but I'm not sure if I can post it, so PM me if you're interested.

I know what it's like to be afraid. I was assaulted in September, and for weeks afterwards I was worried he would come to my apartment too. He never threatened, but he knows where I live...I kept hallucinating that he was in my room at night or knocking on my door.

I know how it feels to be afraid to press charges; I never did, but I got evidence gathered just in case I change my mind. You deserve to be safe, and you deserve to have support on this matter. Do you live near a college campus by chance? Most colleges have something like a Campus Women's Center that have drop-in support groups for everything ranging from writing a dissertation to depression and anxiety to rape and sexual assault. The group setting wasn't for me, but it may help you feel less alone considering you have a limited source of support.

From what you describe, I also agree authorities should be involved, and I think you have a definate case. Hell, maybe he could get charged for the threat or stalking even...

But PLEASE get help for this. My heart is going out to you, and please keep us posted. If you ever need to talk or want advice on how to go about finding help, PM me. I mean that.

Be safe, and take care.