Triggering (Suicide) - Sleeping Pills *OD*

[KittenEyes]

So... I've had insomnia for ages now. Years. And I started taking sleeping pills years ago for it... One time I tried to kill myself I ODed hardcore on them, and got scared of them for a while. But I've been taking them for months straight now... And I ran out. I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm afraid I'll be awake forever, and then my mind will start to race, and go places I don't want it to go... I've been drinking to help it, but it's not the same as the sleeping pills. I don't OD on them at all anymore; well usually I just take the regular dose, unless it's not enough.

I don't know how to stop. I don't know if I want to stop. It just gets frustrating having to take them every night to sleep. If I don't take them I feel like **** in the morning... I'll get more tomorrow.

Can you be addicted to them? I know on the box it says 'non habit-forming', but clearly it's a habit now. You're not meant to take them for an extended period of time. I just feel crappy and don't know how to get over it...

Help?

[x_Electrify]

You're obviously psychologically addicted to them, even if not physically. Can you go to a doctor and get help? If not, forming proper sleep habits (having a routine that relaxes you before bed) could help. Maybe lowering the dosage?
I used to be terrified that i'd be awake for the rest of my life because I had such trouble sleeping, then I got into a proper routine and now I can sleep pretty fine (even though it takes forever to actually fall asleep). My best advice is talk to a doctor or someone who can give you advice medically. Good luck. x