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08-07-2007, 06:36 AM
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#1
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Save me from the nothing I've become
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: NY
I am currently:  
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Triggering (SI) - Why...
I've been dealing with SI for almost 9 years...I'm 21...why haven't I outgrown this?...such a failure... 
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I want to stay in love with my sorrow.
Oh, but God, I want to let it go.
If you look in the mirror and don't like what you see, you can find out first-hand what it's like to be me.
You'll need a symphony to give sympathy to the girl with the worst luck in town.
When I care, it curls me up on the floor and I swear I can't do it anymore.
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08-07-2007, 10:31 AM
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#2
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Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: London area
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I wouldn't say that it's something you 'outgrow' as such, rather than you learn different coping mechanisms.
There is probably a very good reason why you started to SI. It was the best way you knew at the time of coping with things. It takes time to learn new ways of coping with those feelings or situations. You need to find what works for you, what helps.
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08-07-2007, 01:19 PM
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#3
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flooded in a mental state of hell
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: between reality and the afterlife
I am currently: 
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You arent a failure. I have been "dealing with it" for 27 years now. I still desire to cut or burn everyday. sometimes I can go for a year. sometimes I cant go an hour.
Just like Longing said...you learn differnt coping mechanisms. Or you find something to fill that part that makes you want to "do it"
SI is a strange, harsh, torturing venue we take part in. It doesnt make us weird or unacceptable. It just makes us comfortable in a situation for an amount of time that gets us through.
So I repeat....YOU are NOT a failure.
Rain
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the flood is here and i can't keep the rain
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08-07-2007, 07:17 PM
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#4
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Chicago, IL
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You are not a failure. When I started SIing all those years ago, I didn't know what I was doing. We find something that works and stick with it. And it sucks. But you are not a failure.
carrie
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17-07-2007, 06:57 PM
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#7
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Join Date: Jun 2007
I am currently: 
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I'm 37 now. I thought i'd be over it by now too but it somehow keeps coming back in times of stress. Maybe it's just a way of coping?
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17-07-2007, 09:40 PM
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#8
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: at the end of the rainbow
I am currently:
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yes, i believe its a way of coping. and no matter how old you are, until you learn other ways you'll probably always fall back on it. when i find something that works for me i usually stick with it. and SI has worked for 19 years. im working hard right now on staying SI free but its been hard these past few days. im just wondering if youre in therapy or ever have been? that might be a great help for you.
much love.
xx
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