Goodbye for a little while...

[pea soup]

im sorry.
i dont know whats happening to me.
but i have to stay away for a little while.
i feel really strange and i dont know what i might say or do.
im not going to post or reply for a while until i feel a bit safer.
i'll still be lurking around here though.
and you all will be in my thoughts.
love to everyone.
xx

[pea soup]

i just said i wasnt going to post anymore.
im scared.
im home alone.
im hearing things in my dresser drawers!!!
there is nothing in there!!!
im really scared.
my dog doesnt hear anything or he'd be barking.
and....this is going to sound really strange but i feel really strange....my pictures are moving and talking. only the ones in frames. everyone is smiling...but the smiles go away and turn to serious faces and then i can hear them whispering.

i dont want the whispers again. im scared. i want to call someone but im afraid they would come and get me. im safe here at home. im not going to do anything. i just want the noises to go away. and i want my pictures in the frames to stop moving. i know this isnt real and thats why im scared. and now i sound really stupid but i dont care.

am i going crazy?
i want to go to bed but im afraid to turn out the lights.
im afraid to relax.
im afraid something will get me.
i want my brother to come home.

why is this happening?
im really scared

[pea soup]

can i please just type for a little bit?
i have my music on loud now.
and i made my dog come and sit beside me.
i feel a bit calmer now.
ive decided just not to look at my pictures anymore. its very hard not to though. kinda like "not looking at a car crash".

i dont know whats gotten into me tonight. my body feels tingly and strange. maybe im just having a really bad anxiety attack?

ok...my sister just called and i told her what was happening. she said that she was feeling uneasy too..soooo....she has hopped in her car and is on her way to stay with me!!!!! so, i guess we can keep each other company.

xx

[TouchVanDerBoom]

That's really good of her, you're lucky to have a sister. Stay calm and talk to her about how you feel. I hope you don't go away, what will I do without my long lost big sister?

**hugs**

[bleedingdragon]

Gently hugs you,
I hope your sister helps you, and you feel better
having company is a good idea
and especially if shes supporting you right now
please dont worry it sounds scary what you describe
im glad you feel a little better
please take a break and look after yourself right now,

ryl is allways here for you when you return.

I too am hovering in and out of ryl, its frustrating to me, but im posting when i can and keeping my distance when i need to.

so we all need to do whats best.
much love
Dave

[~*forever_broken*~]

Oh hunni
*hugs you*
I'm glad your sister could come over.
Please take care of yourself
*hugs again*

Alyssa

[*lily*]

stay safe dear sis
that is a beautiful picture you are truly beautiful inside and out
xxxxlily

[akita]

Look after yourself Rachel.

xxx

[Mandimoo]

put the pictures flat on their faces. turn up the music, play a game (look at choclatier on msn games http://zone.msn.com - you get an hour's trial, but if you leave it running it dosnt realise you had more than an hour),
turn out your dressr drawers and put them (empty) face up so you know there's nothing there.

I hope you and your sister have a nice time together, mand x

[The Hierophant]

I hope you feel better soon.

good luck. xxx

[chocostashchick]

aw honey i am sorry that things are crapp and weird
but i'm so glad that your sister was able to come that day it is great to have a relationship with a sibling like that
i hope that you are doing better
update us when you are up to it
*Huge Big Massive Hugs*

[Destinationzero]

I'm glad you have your sister to be with for a while. We will be here if you need anything and I hope things get a little better. Sometimes having someone there can take the things from your mind away so you can calm down. If you need anything though we'll be here for you.

[Mandimoo]

hey rach, you're being quiet on msn, am a little worried bout you, hop its just your pc signing you in automatically and not something more serious, hope you had a good day with your sister, i know you dont always see eye to eye about everything, lots of love, mand x