Just wondering if i could possibly PM someone who's gone into hospital (in the UK) as an inpatient?
I have a bunch of questions in my head, and i'm feeling slightly uneasy about the possibility of going in, so i'd really like to speak to someone with experience of going into hospital.
PM me if you want a PDF copy of the ICD-10or the Mental Health Act 1983/2007. I ALSO HAVE THE DSM-V BOOK and am a pharmacology student.
I have a visual impairment / neurological problems so I need people to type in clear text and no funny fonts. Also excuse any typos, my vision blocks things out.
I have autism and have problems communicating, PMs included.
Just becasue I type well doesn't mean I speak well. I am only part time verbal.
Hi Acrasia...PM me if you want,I'm more than happy to answer any questions you have....I too unfortunately am more than qualified I think to answer anything about inpatient admissions so feel free to fire away.
Me too. Just out on friday. Been voluntry and sectioned too. good and bad admissions.
I want to kiss the bottom of the ocean before I burst through its surface into the sunlight, otherwise I will always be wondering about what was left unseen at the bottom
i'm tired of chasing my dreams. i'm just gonna ask where they're going, and hook up with them later.
Er...
I can't really choose between any of you because my brain isn't functioning properly today (does it ever, ha), so i'll try put something together here..
Might i add before i go on these are really trivial questions (or atleast, i feel they are), but, it's more of a peace of mind situation than anything.
Spoke to GP last Friday as i was in a right old state, he keeps mentioning hospitalisation, as does my careworker Gemma.
The only reason i'm seemingly holding it together is for my mother, which in turn is making me resent her, which is in turn making me climb the walls. It's now been nearly 4 days since i've slept, i'm absolutely exhausted, some of my very close friends online (who have known me since i was 13) are trying to persuade me to go into hospital for a "rest" (which is also my GP/Careworkers way of putting it), but i'm rather wary of going in.
Not entirely sure why. I think a part of it is convincing myself i'm fine (the whole denial part), which in turn makes me believe i'd be an idiot for asking about being put into hospital because i'm not "ill" enough.
I'm extremely good at putting a front on, especially to my mother/father (as i am still living at home), the only time i let myself think is when i'm in my room (which is a massive percentage of the time), so when i come into contact with them it seems the switch comes on and i'm someone completely different.
I'm also like this with my careworker Gemma, which also adds to the whole "They won't believe i'm ill" scenario.
It's a bad habit i've developed over the years through problems in my past, grin and bare it, don't let people know of what's going on..etc.
Anyway. Slightly off topic.
Recently been diagnosed with BPD, seeing a doctor from a company called complex cases (who work in Cambridge) tomorrow. They have to make a trip to a nearby town because i'm unable to travel to Cambridge (suffer with agoraphobia/social phobia). Seeing them in the morning, my careworker is picking me up in her car and taking me to the appointment.
They specialise in BPD, so, i'm assuming they will be taking me through the "ropes", i.e., what options i have, what BPD is, etc.
I'm not in the recovery mindset. Infact, for the past 2 months i've made detailed plans to take my life. My concern is i am so exhausted at this current time, i will not successfully fulfill my goal in ending my life, and i will botch it up. I have promised myself i will not ever try to take my life again and fail, if i am to do it again i will make sure i succeed.
Which has put me in a slightly difficult position. Temazepam are no longer effective. I've tried every possible angle in trying to get rest, to rest my mind. If i'm lucky enough to get an hour, i will wake up feeling more exhausted - like my body has rested but my mind hasn't.
I have problems relationship wise with my parents, which is adding to the wreck my mind has become. I can't think straight, for example, i have 3 books on the go because i can't concentrate on one thing at a time. (It's also taken me nearly an hour to type this).
I feel in my own mind i have deterioated, but i seem unwilling to admit this.
The small worries about hospital give me good excuses to avoid going.
I smoke 20 a day, smoking is possibly the only thing keeping me mildly sane at the moment, with the whole non smoking ban, would they have a smoking area??
I can't socialise. I've gone from working in a pub full of people, to becoming a recluse in my own room completely petrified by strangers. Would i get my own room, or would it be a case of having to share??
Eating is a big no no infront of others. I compulsive overeat, which is an emotional problem i've had for years. I have massive body hang ups because of my size, and i can't eat around other people - including my parents.
Do i have to "eat" with others, or would i beable to eat in my room?
What if i'm not able to sleep IN hospital? Afterall, that's what i'd be going for - to get some rest mentally.
Would i be forced to join in social events? Group gatherings?
How long would i beable to stay for? Can i discharge myself at anytime? Would i be forced into therapy?
Basically. I want to be on my own for a few days. I understand i'll have the comings and goings of nurses, but i mean from..other people.
The option is there to go, but i'm not sure if to take it. Mentally, i feel i've let myself down in regards to my plans because i've worked incredibly hard right down to the last detail, so i feel i should stick to what is already planned. On the flip side, as mentioned above, i feel so exhausted i'm not even sure what day it is the majority of the time.
Er. This is long. And i probably make no sense.
Thankyou to those who wish to reply. I'm not entirely sure how long this will be up for before the paranoia sets in, but, i'll try to keep it here for as long as possible.
x
Last edited by Puppet Strings : 19-12-2008 at 07:33 PM.
Reason: Removed date of proposed suicide - please don't make suicide notes, and related things like specific dates.
Just a quick reply cos my brain isn't functioning all too well at the moment, I hope it makes some sense!
All the questions you've asked are variable depending on what ward you go into. My normal ward has an outside smoking area, but when there were no beds on that ward I went to a different one that had allocated smoking times. The bed situation again depends on where you go. Both wards I've been on I've had my own room (one of which even had an en-suite shower, sink, and toilet!) but I've heard of other wards where you do have to share.
All these worries that you have your careworker should be able to answer for you, she'll know the ward you could potentially go into, and I don't think she'll think you silly for asking either, I guarantee everyone has anxieties about going on to a ward.
Hope I've helped somewhat.
Take care of yourself
Boa
x x x
Talk about a dream, try to make it real... you wake up in the night with a fear so real...
Most psychiatric hospitals now have an outside smoking area. Something like 80-90% of inpatients smoke so they know it's very important. In all of the hospitals I've been in, I've always been able to smoke.
As to whether you get your own room or have to share, it pretty much depends on the layout of the hospital. My old psych hosp had a dorm for about twelve patients and two single rooms, but they've recently rebuilt the hospital and all of the rooms are single and en suite.
Eating is pretty much the same everywhere, you are expected to eat with everyone else in the dining room. But I would imagine if you have issues over food, they might be able to work something out or help you at mealtimes but they will be pretty limited with what they can do.
You wont be forced into doing anything, but the occupational therapy groups are good to go to just to stop yourself getting so bored because there is nothing else to do. Most of the groups are arts and crafts based so there's not much socialising.
If you go in voluntarily you can discharge yourself. A doctor will still have to discharge you (so you can't walk out at 3am). If whilst you are in hospital it becomes evident you are suicidal or are going to harm yourself on discharge and you are threatening to leave, they can section you to stop you leaving for your own safety.
There are different types of sections lasting different amounts of time. If you threaten to leave and a doctor isn't there, a nurse can section you for a couple of hours until a doctor can assess you. A doctor can put you on a section two which will keep you in hospital for 28 days for assessment. He can then transfer the section to a section three, or place you on a section three outright, which lasts for six months and is for treatment, in which case they can give you medication or other treatment without your consent. If you were to be sectioned, you would be told about it and explained what your rights were, and you could appeal the section or a doctor can rescind the section at any time.
I hope I haven't scared you by mentioning sections, they really are a last resort and they don't like doing it. The best way to not get sectioned is if you want to leave and the doctor says he'd like you to stay, then stay.
I've been in and out of hospital for two years with numerous admissions and have only been sectioned once.
Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back, everything is different…
you once called your brain a hard drive, well say hello to the virus.
Er. This is long. And i probably make no sense.
Thankyou to those who wish to reply. I'm not entirely sure how long this will be up for before the paranoia sets in, but, i'll try to keep it here for as long as possible.
I'll answer as well cause things vary..
Yeah I agree most hospitals will allow smoking, maybe only at certain times in the day..
I think it really depends on the hospital wether you share or not, I didn't have to.
I don't think you'd be allowed to eat in your room, we has to eat all together ED or not. It might be different though you never know.
Lost of people find it hard to sleep in hospital, they might give you something to help you sleep.
I think group things would be encouraged as they can help and being a recluse only makes things worse, but I don't think they would really force anything on you. You don't relaly get alone time in a psych unit, there are usually nurses everywhere and other patients, although most are abosrbed in their own stuff...
It isn't a decision to be taken lightly, you also can't really dictate whether you'll just stay a few days, or a few weeks, you kind of give up control of yourself. Hospitals can be really useful but can be detrimental as well
Let the Force be with you
I'm not short, I'm space efficient
Just wanted to thank those of you who have replied thus far.
I will be speaking to my careworker in the morning, or atleast, that's my intention, about going in as an inpatient/what is involved.
And i also want to state - it slightly urks me when someone says hospital isn't to be taken lightly, i'm 22 years old, i've been avoiding hospital at all costs, so i do know this is not an option to be taken lightly. I'm sure my GP or careworker wouldn't have actually even brought it up if they believed i'd take the option without thinking about it first.
Having everything taken out of my control is possibly the best thing anyone can do right now.
But thankyou for replying.
The only thing i'm not keen on is the eating side of things. Hm.
But yes, thankyou.
x
I am really glad to hear that you are considering hospital, and I know it isn't something that you are taking lightly. Given your recent posts it has come across to me (and I don't even know you) that you need some help right now. I hope that you'll be able to get that because things sound awful for you.
I think most of your questions have been answered so I won't go on too much because it's all there but in answer to your question, what happens if you can't sleep - it's likely that if you can't sleep, the Nurses will arrange for you to have a chat with one of the Doctors and see if there is medication that can help you sleep. Many patients can't sleep on the wards, I myself spent most of my time up and about at night and nothing bad happens to you so don't worry. Some staff will encourage you to try and stay in bed and sleep, whilst others don't mind having a chat etc. It does depend but if you can't sleep, don't worry.
Just wanted to update really for those of you who were/are interested in the outcome of my appointment this morning.
I saw a psychiatrist as i said above from a place called complex cases in Cambridge (he travelled especially to another town to see me as my nerves won't let me get to Cambridge) and my careworker picked me up/took me home.
Basically, he kept pushing questions on me, i was taken aback as naively i believed i was just going and he was going to explain loads about BPD. Gave the answers best i could (not slept for days).
I'm very much used to putting a front on (happy/bubbly/jolly), it's a habit i've developed over the years from childhood, i was exactly like that in the appointment. He was told previously i had plans.
Basically, i don't trust anyone, he wants me to trust someone even a "little bit" and open up, which i can't do.
Because of my plans, he offered me a stay in hospital (did not mention for how long), or, they'd have to seriously consider forcing to keep me safe. So basically, i either agreed to go into hospital, or they were going to section me.
I managed to somehow persuade them to let me come home today so i could spend tonight at home, only if i gave over any meds and accepted a visit from the crisis team this evening. Which i do not want, but i can't get out of.
I'm having to pack tonight along with informing some sites i go on of whats going on so they don't worry about my sudden disappearance.
I'm absolutely petrified. I feel completely out of control. I understand i said above that taking things out of my hands would probably be the best thing, but that does not make it any easier.
I feel like a child.
My self esteem/confidence is non existant. I believe i will be rejected by everyone on the ward and completely hated. I am a fat ugly cow who will simply be LAUGHED at.
That is more petrifying than actually being forced into therapy.
It's possible i may not get my own room. Which is also worrying me. I just want to be on my own but i feel forced into doing things i don't wish to do, and because i'm too much of a nice person i just grin and bear it, which is part of my problem as to why i'm like i am because i don't say no.
I'm making no sense. Sorry.
No idea how long i'll be in there for. I want to come home for Christmas/Boxing Day but i don't know how possible that is right now.
Thankyou to those who have replied and offered support.
If by chance they do have internet access there (unlikely but possible) but i will update the thread.
I'm so proud of you baby, accepting this when it's the hardest thing in the world. You are so strong, more than you know. I'll be in touch all the time and thinking of you too. I'll try and update people here and print off any messages you can't see if you'd like?
Love you so so much xxxxxxxxx
How could you become as awesome as you are and still feel like a loser?
That'd be great Helen *hugs you* You're such a wonderful friend, i love you dearly.
Although i don't think i'll get many more replies now. I'm invisable on here under this name lol.
Love you
XXXXXXXXXX
Best of luck sweetheart. I'm so glad you are going to take this oppurtunity even though it's scaring you so much. Thinking of you, and if you'd like me to get in touch then PM me :) xxx
No problemo, I'll print stuff out and send it to you, it's no problems. I'll keep writing the updates on this thread, so people can come here if they're interested, I'm sure they will care and want to know how you're getting on, even though your new name hides you from a few who would know who you are.
You are a wonderful friend too, that's why I'd do anything for you!
Thanks also tinkerbelle, that's really sweet of you, any support is appreciated right now as you can imagine. It's a frightening time.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
How could you become as awesome as you are and still feel like a loser?
