I don't know, I'm scared.

[Gordon.]

I think I have paranoia.
I don't know what to do though.
It's out of hand.

[alienshe_cheesycake]

what is it that your paranoid about hun?
It's good that you can recognise that you might have a problem

xxxxxxxxxx

[Louise]

could you give us a bit more on why you think you might have paranoia? it is good that you recognise you have a problem because that can be hard. xx

[Gordon.]

Everything really. I know I have a problem, but it doesn't stop me believing all the thoughts.

I'm just scared people hate me in general and I can't trust anyone. I literally go insane if someone says something and I automatically assume it means something really over the top. I can't easily explain what I'm like, I just really think I have it.

I looked up the symptoms on a website and found this:

• preoccupied with unsupported doubts about friends or associates
• suspicious; unfounded suspicions; believes others are plotting against him/her
• perceives attacks on his/her reputation that are not clear to others, and is quick to counterattack
• maintains unfounded suspicions regarding the fidelity of a spouse or significant other
• reads negative meanings into innocuous remarks
• reluctant to confide in others due to a fear that information may be used against him/her

and it all applies to me, which is pretty scary..
x

[guiltyinnocence]

*hugs*
paranoia ccan be a pretty scary and horrible thing to go through
do you have a therapist or anyone you could bring these thoughts up with?
xxxx

[Gordon.]

Not really, I've got some counsellor in school and a school nurse.

I can't let them know how bad I'm feeling right now, at the moment they're threatening to tell my parents about cutting, so it wouldn't look good if I suddenly brought up the fact I have some kind of mental illness as well?

So far this week, it's been getting worse. I've lost so many friends, but I can't explain to them why I get so scared they hate me and are bitching about me. It's just be being a crap friend.

I dunno who to go to about it rly.
x

[alienshe_cheesycake]

Maybe it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world for your parents to find out that your struggling hun?

I don't know what your parents reaction to this kind of stuff might be
but from experience my parents were upset when they found out about my cutting and they overreacted but they got over it and helped me get some help.

Cos I really think this paranoia stuff would be good to bring up with your councellor

[guiltyinnocence]

how do you think your parents would react if they found out?
i think your counsellor could really help you..
could u not tell you friends that you know you're acting a little different atm, but you're just having a difficult time? u dont have to go into specifics with them, just maybe let them know that things are a bit hard for you atm
xxxx