Mildly Triggering (ED) - Not sure what to say!

[*candyfloss*]

Hiya,

I don't really talk about my eating problems that much... only with my CPN and psychiatrist. But things are getting hard. I am restricting myself and then I'll bring what ever I eat back up. I know purging is bad but I need to do it to get all of that horrible food that I am forced to eat out. Yuck, I feel so fat and they keep on telling me that I am not. My CPN says I have the same BMI as here... how is that possible?

I just want to lose lots of weight! It doesn't help that my mum forces me to eat breakfast... WELL... I'm not going to eat breakfast tomorrow, so there!

I'm sorry for the ramble and thank you for reading,

Leigh xx

[nowhereman]

Leigh, I know how hard it is to talk about eating problems, but well done for posting here and talking to us about it, that's a big first step. If people are telling you you're not fat then you're not. I know me saying that doesn't help you believe it but I'm saying it anyway. From what I can tell you don't need to lose any weight, never mind lots. Please try eat breakfast if you can, your mum only makes you eat it cos she's concerned about you, she loves you and wants to see you well and you need food to be well and to live. I hope it helped a bit to write this down and I hope you find the support you need.

[sparkle.]

keep talking to your CPN about it hun, that's a really good thing that they know. I know it's hard when people tell you you're not fat, but you feel it. But it's because of the distorted perception EDs involve.
Try to eat even if it's just a little, and breakfast is the most important meal of the day, it kick starts your metabolism etc.
How are you feeling now? xxx take care

[random.swirls]

Hello,

Just want to say welcome to RYL :)

It can be really difficult coping with everything and feeling pressured to eat but I do just want to say that your mum is doing it because she cares and because eating is such an important part of life if you think about it you wouldn't run a car without petrol and yet you are trying to 'live' without food.

Are you being honest with your CPN and if so do you find it helpful?

xoxox

[Droplet]

Hi Leigh. It's nice to have you here. :) I have a few questions..

Why do you want to lose weight? Why can't you trust what others say about your weight?

What does losing weight mean to you? What difference would it make in your life? That might involve feelings being brought up. You might want people to like you, admire your strength, envy you, or a number of things.

I noticed you said your mum wants you to eat breakfast but you won't tomorrow. When I read that I thought of the word 'rebelling', do you want to rebel, do you feel tied down in any way? Of course I may be barking up the wrong tree here, if so, forgive me. :)

Much love. Please take care of yourself. I have to go to the dentist soon and I am dreading it, because of my purging. That's one reason to look after yourself.

Miranda. x