Triggering (SI) - Paranoid HELP!!!!!

[xanthismom]

I have borderline personality disorder and have not hurt myself in 1half months now my boyfriendshas gone home earlier then normal i feel abadoned and paranioid and want to hurt myself the only thing holding me back ios mmy boyfriend.
he may not beable to come doen next weekend due to car troubles that why he left earlier as he has work 2moz.I feel like he does not love me he says he does but parania is taking over.HELP I NEED ADVICE the crises team are fed up of me ringing just cos i have borderline i feel they dont listen to me.

[melda]

First of all you should be really proud of the fact that you havent hurt yourself in 1 and a half months, you have done really well. Your mind sounds like it is racing and you may be jumping to conclusions about why your boyfriend cant see you, just because he has a busy life and he has car troubles doesnt mean that he doesnt love you. He wouldnt be with you if he didnt love you.

The crisis team shouldnt be fed up of you because you have BPD, it is their job to help but if you feel like you are being a nuscience, then what about contacting samaritans, they can be really useful and it is anonymous so if you rang up lots of time they still wouldnt know that it is you so they couldnt get annoyed with you ringing because they wouldnt know who you are.

Could you explain to your boyfriend how you are feeling? That might be able to put your mind at rest, talk it through with him. Are you getting any support from anyone else like a professional. Are your family supportive, could you talk to them about how you feel?

[Stellata]

Deep insecurity can cause paranoid feelings to become really intense. It's frightening, isn't it? The good thing about the feelings is that they don't last forever, even though it feels like it at the time. And it's a really good thing that you can recognise how you're feeling, and why.