scared of everyone *could trig, sexual harrassment* *ADULT*

i've become scared of older men recently. i've never been raped or molested that i know of (some people were trying to say i did way long time ago and didn't remember, but i'm done trying to figure it out)... however i've been in many situations where older men would sexually harrass/hit on me. i don't know what draws it. like when i'm working (was in a department store, food place, and now selling position) they'll come up and start flirting with me, and i feel so gross. and the worst part was when i was stupid and tried being a stripper for a few weeks. not only did you have to give lap dances, but sometimes when you were, the older men would try to touch you in places they weren't supposed to. and it just kinda went on cause the management at those places is so crappy they didn't care. i'm way out of there now thank god, but the compilation of all these things is getting to me. and i was also volunteering at this zoo for about a year and a half where one of the older guys (who was very high up in control/management) would hit on all the younger girls, and we just had to deal with it or leave. and it was such a good opportunity experience wise so we didn't leave.

and it also seems like now that i've got a boyfriend, random guys in general will hit on me and stuff. when i was single that was a compliment. now i genuinely HATE it. it's not a compliment; they want me for sex. i feel violated and vulnerable. like guys (older and younger) will whistle or make stupid calls or yell out (often while i'm with my bf) that his gf is hot. it's just little stupid stuff, but it's making me both scared and mad. i don't know if i'm just more confident now that i have a bf and they notice it or if they're trying to rile up my bf (he's only with me part of the time). but because it's happened so often i'm starting to get scared of guys, particularly older ones. i know it's kinda stupid. i'm not being abused. i just either hate young guys who look at me (probably sometimes innocently)/flirt with me or hate & am very scared of the older ones who are just gross. it's like i'm 19. you're 40. or 60. get a life. i just want to get away but more keep doing it. and cause i'm often in a work environment i have to laugh it off or ignore it. and i can't report it as harassment cause it's customers that just say a few things and then leave.

and i'm starting to not know the difference between an older guy saying i'm pretty and him actually meaning something bad. or does he always mean something bad when he calls you pretty? i don't know why this is happening and i know i'm overreacting, but i'm just suspicious of everyone and i don't even like it when guys at my work will be friendly. but yet i'm fine with my bf's friends who are all guys. maybe cause i know they're not after me that way. except one of his friends who constantly makes comments that i know he likes me. and i am uncomfortable around him.

ok i'm rambling. but does anyone know how i can stop being scared or how i should deal with it?