2 years free ... and slipping

secrets & lies · 25-10-2008, 09:50 PM

Hey

I haven't been on here for ages as I went travelling for a year so feel bad asking for help and don't know if this is the right place to put this.

I was almost 2 years SI free with no slip ups or anything until last month when I gave into the urges I'd been having for a while. I think it was due to the fact that my travels were nearly finished and the thought of coming back home again and uncertainty about the future. Now I'm home and I'm really struggling not to go back to SI again. I have no real reason to and know in the back of my mind that I don't need to SI but I could really do with some support/encouragement to keep going and not give up. Do urges ever go away?

Sorry I feel stupid for asking for this but I need something to keep me on track!

~SuNsHiNe~ · 26-10-2008, 08:44 AM

I dont know if they ever truly go away, or if its just a matter of learning to manage them better. sorry to hear youre feeling like this, I know how difficult it can be and it sucks. can you try writing yourself a list of all the reasons not to SH so you can look at that when your feeling triggered? theres also lots of distractions etc on ryl if you need to use them...were all here to support you tho and my pm box is always open:) take care ***hugs***

bexie · 28-10-2008, 11:01 AM

thats great 2 years is a long time!
all i can say is keep trying and you have come this far already.
*huggles*
xxx

crazykat · 28-10-2008, 11:21 AM

First of all a very big well done on making it two years, that is amazing and definetely something to be proud of. As far as asking for help please don't feel bad about it, its what we are here for. It doesn't matter that you have been away from here for awhile, you still deserve the support.

Don't feel bad about slipping up, its part of recovery. Just try and see it as a slight bump in the road of recovery. Its understandable things have gotten bit on top of you and the urges have increased. Adjusting to life back at home after being away for that long can be difficult so give yourself time to adjust to it all and be easy on yourself.

You can fight this, you don't need to self harm. You deserve to be looked after not causing yourself anymore pain. Perhaps you could write a list someone of all the reasons you don't want to self harm and then pin it up somewhere you are going to see it or even have it wherever your tools are soo you have to read that before you make the choice to self-harm so at least it gives you a proper chance to think it through. Please feel free to PM me if you ever need anything.

Take care and best of luck
Kat xxx

OutOfTheWoods11 · 28-10-2008, 11:07 PM

@ years is amazing! Hang in there hun! You know we're here for you!

secrets & lies · 02-11-2008, 01:19 PM

Thanks for the replies! I have all the reasons not to SH in my head but maybe I should write them all down as then it's harder to ignore them. I'm feeling a little more positive this week as I'm now working again and have managed to meet up with some friends I haven't seen in ages which has really helped and keeping busy is always good!

Thank you for the support, I'm going to try my best to keep going!

~AngelofLove~ · 03-11-2008, 02:06 PM

*hugs* congrats on the two years. Next week will be 2 years for me!

it might help to write down your feelings. and if you ever need to talk you can contact me *more hugs*

You can beat SI