i got everything i wanted

and i still feel ****. ive got friends i got to go to the university i wanted to go too. but i still feel like **** im still depressed i still wanna die and i dont get why. why cant i be happy ive got great flat mates i have the chance to excel and all i can think about is self harming and dying what wrong with me.

[Heidi Tiger]

Nothing is wrong with you. But far too many people see university as the magic bullet, you're not suddenly going to be well just because your situation changes. However university is a good opportunity to get well as there are so many support systems there. Have you though about contacting the counselling service? And what about letting your flatmates know that you are struggling a bit. It's going to be a struggle getting better, but nothing worthwhile ever took no effort to achieve. You'll get there.
take care
xxx

[Misunderstood.]

If you've got everything you want then I've got a feeling you're still feeling as bad as you are because of the depression in itself. It's a chemical imbalance and sometimes nothing in your life, good as it may seem to others or good as you might've thought it'd make you feel; will make you feel any better. Because it's circumstantial.
Do you see a doctor about the depression?
Might be an idea to see about going on an anti-depressent..
..just a thought.
{hug}

[yanna]

tecnically what is 'wrong with you' is probably that you suffer from depression, and it is normal that it won't go away because of life circumstances (though it can sometimes make it easier to cope with if you have fewer stresses).

help is available though; either through the medical reoute of antidepressants, or some sort of therapy or councelling (most unis have a councelling service), or preferabley both.

one thing that definatly won't help is to be inpatient and angry with yourself for not feeling anything other than what you are.

~yanna~

[Stellata]

That's what depression is, basically.
Generally, it doesn't change with circumstances.
That's why it's known as a 'mood disorder'. Your feelings and responses to things get 'miswired' inside.
Are you in treatment?

i have suffered for depression 5 years i have been in therapy for that long and i am now in adult services im on 30 mg mitrazisprin sp* i have now had to change doctors to my uni one dur to repeat but i dont like taking my meds nemore cus it makes me sooo drowsy my sleeping is much better but my moods arent wat do i do

[Stellata]

So, are you actually taking your medication? Could you ask for a medication review?
In terms of therapy, you may need to look again at what you're working on, and what might help most.

intermittently cus it makes me soo drowsy that i find it hard to stay awake and it doesnt help my moods etc. in terms of therapy i see a psychiatrist every 4 months and a cpn but due to the fact i have moved away for uni i dont c him and looking to transfer but i dont know wat to say to the nurse when i see her next week at my uni.

[x-dying-inside-x]

hunny you need to tell her how you feel and that you need some support.
i feel the same as you right now, ive have everything i could want but im not happy. you need to tell her about how your meds make you feel aswell.

i know but ive never met this nurse be4 shes gonna think im soo stupid

[x-dying-inside-x]

she will not think you stupid she will think that your a person who wants help hunny.
i went back to see CAMHs on thursday for the first time in over five months and she said how brave i was to get help but hunny if you need the help ask for it, i know its hard but be brave.
xxxx

i can go bk and see my cpn bk at home and ii might on friday but shes just a practise nurse at the uni and i know im probly now the only one who has been there with problems. its everything is suppose to be better now ive got wat i wanted the course the uni the best flat mates but. im still not happy its frustrating ive done all the therapy etc and now im in adult services its better but im still not happy i dont think i ever will be