... funerals; being back at home [although it's just for the night to pick up more stuff]; being away from my mates; being away from cuddles; having to let people go; not being around when people need me; not being able to help the ones I love; being too damn scared to apply for a job I know I'll be GREAT at because Paul wanker rapist **** wants to work there too [had enough of that at Wimbledon]; not being sat on my sofa opposite my best mate having a massive heart-to-heart at stupid o'clock in the morning; having no money [Matthew you were right, paying for things on my card & never checking my balance = BAD].
Things will get better. I will get the bottle to apply for that job and temp in the mean time. I will find another person who I can love like family [actually I doubt that]. I will get more cuddles. I will be back with my mates tomorrow. There will be more sofa heart-to-hearts.
It's just the inbetween. The pivoting point between picking myself up again and letting myself drop.
I will do this. I just need a little push etc please?
I know you have a very difficult relationship with your father, and i understand your frustrations as i have an extremely volatile relationship with my mother.
So i do understand the mix of emotions you're feeling in regards to that..anger, hurt, upset.
I think you need to remember that you're better than anything your father ever says to you - you're a good person regardless of his put downs.
You can get better Chel's, you can get the confidence to go for jobs. It just takes time, you need to have patience with yourself.
*big hugs*
Keep your chin up. And remember..you can do this. xx
Hi. I just wanted to let you know that I know what it's like to feel like you should be at uni when you aren't there. You can do this, you can get through this, and there will be plenty of love and friendships to help you on your way.
Kahlia
She shouts, she screams, she smashes your dreams . . .
Would you mind if I killed you? Would you mind if I tried to?
'Cause you have turned into my worst enemy,
You carry hate that I don't feel: It's over now WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
* Proud Plumeria Sister * My Support Thread * I got lei'd in vets *
* My RYL Family: big brother Doikers; little sisters MammaMia & flutterby butterfly *
Things will get better. I will get the bottle to apply for that job and temp in the mean time. I will find another person who I can love like family [actually I doubt that]. I will get more cuddles. I will be back with my mates tomorrow. There will be more sofa heart-to-hearts.
This is a great attitude. Try to keep reminding yourself that these things WILL happen. You have the strength to get there and we are here to support you in the times between when you feel low.
- Moved into my house in Southampton.
- Talked to the council about my council tax, got a form for the council tax benefit & been sorting that out [thanks muchly to Matthew who actually knows something about this when I don't :|].
- Been to all the job agency's in Southampton & signed up to them, although I have to email a few my CV.
- Sorted out internets.
- Been to the doctors, and asked for a re-referal to the Mental Health place in Southampton.
- Been to the doctors re. headaches
- Applied for a job with Southampton Football club
- Sorted out water/gas/electricity bills
Don't seem like much now, to be honest, but I'm knackered.
That's a heck of alot Chels,
you should be immensly proud of yourself.
I'll be in your position once the council get back to me,
and i couldn't imagine even doing half of that on my own..
So honestly, you should be really proud of yourself.
Well done hun xx
