Triggering (Abuse) - At home. Again. Scared shitless.
They've been away since Sunday.
Came back about an hour ago.
OMG I've never been so scared of him. Never.
There's the little things like this [sorry if it sounds wierd, c&p'd off of msn cos it's quicker]:
they come back and they wont notice the 4328932 things i've done right, or that i've tidied up properly, or that i've hoovered when they didnt ask me to, or whatever, but OHNOES i forgot to unstack the dishwasher [which, by the way, freddie said she'd do] and hell breaks loose.
Chelsea says:
and dad now needs me to put something on eBay for him. wouldnt be a problem if he hadn't insisted that i show him exactly how to do it [which took me 2 hours, by the way] last time so he could do it himself.
Chelsea says:
so now my sister gets bollocked because she was supposed to have done it even though she's out from being at school from 8:00am 'til 6pm, has to sort out the houses, eat, and do her homework
Then I come in my room do some chatting to people. etc etc. Then go and unstack the dish-washer. While I'm doing that he's calling me a fat lazy cow [true] and saying im worthless. Turns his back on me and then asks "how's your friend?". I ask him what he means [my exact words were "what do you mean?"] and omg I have never ever ever been so scared of him in my life. Shouting, advancing on me, ****ing rolling pin in his hand. Hits me once, hits me twice. Not hard, not softly. "I'm sorry I'm sorry" is all I can manage to say. Then he stops as suddenly as he started and just says "next time I won't bother ****ing asking".
Next time I'll leave a knife on the side for him. Hopefully he'll kill me. Then everyone can see what a **** he was as well as putting me out of this hell.
Ohhh yesh, can you stay at your friends? Any way you can get out of there?? *huge huggles* Take care chels!! You DON'T deserve any of whats happening *cuddles*
I'm really sorry to read that you have to live in such a bad atmosphere with such a scary person =[[ I know what it's like to feel like you have to tread on eggshells and no matter how much you do that is right, the apparent wrong thing will be the only thing that is noticed. You shouldn't have to feel that you need to keep escaping. Home is meant to be safe and relaxed but I know it is often far from that indeed as in your case. He doesn't sound like someone who can be reasoned with.
Is there anywhere else you can go, hon?
Oh Babe. Can you get out of there permanently? And I mean to LIVE somewhere else? No-one should be treated that way, and you definitely do not deserve it.
Take care
Loz xxx
You don't have to be a monkey to recognize a banana!
I'm moving out to Southampton fairly soon, which is good, but every time I try and pack and stuff there's a reason for me not doing it. They go away & need me to house sit, or they need the car, or whatever.
However, I AM moving down this Monday. Tuesday at the latest [if I go and stay with my friend this weekend].
I told my Mum I wanted to go and stay with a friend who's already in Southampton tomorrow night, and she was really put out, said my room's a tip [but only because I've been packing so pulling things out from everywhere etc] so I'll give it a quick tidy up so she can't complain and leave tomorrow afternoonish, just for the night.
Sorry to sound blunt but he is a total bastard. I would keep a cricket bat handy and next time he lunges at you with a rolling pin you can knock him out. Better still get the ****ing hell out of there quick smart. Don't listen to what he says. You're NOT A FAT LAZY COW but he is a ****. Some people don't deserve a family at all
Please get out of there and find yourself somewhere to live. Can you stay with friends temporarily? If not and you had to stay in your car you should get assistance straight away from public housing. You DON'T have to live with that abusive ****!!!!! Calling the cops would be a good idea too so they can through his abusive ass into the slammer where he belongs.
I'm thinking of you hun. Please get out for your own safety.
Nathan
"For those who fight for it, life has a flavour the sheltered never know"
-Pinned to a noticeboard at the US Command Post in Khe Sanh.
In forgiving others, we are not exonerating them. They may not deserve exoneration. Rather, in forgiving others we are giving up our anger over the fact that what happened is not what "should" have happened or that our life is not the way it "should" have been.
I don't have anything productive to say that hasn't been said but you have to get out of there babe. It's not healthy and he has no right whatsoever to hurt you like this.
We care about you and we're all here for you if you need.
Look after yourself, and screw him you do what you want.
Take care,
Iz x
You might win one battle.
But know this; I'll win the ****ing war.
