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23-09-2008, 09:45 AM
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#1
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Triggering (SI) - My mental health
The last few days have been very hard.
I was feeling strong, able to ignore Beth and get on with things. But recently I've just been finding it so hard to deal with her. I can't ignore her any more, last night I couldn't sleep until the sun came up at 7am because she kept telling me the devil was going to rape me.
It's just not fair. I'm so tired of her. And it's been especially hard because everyone thinks I'm doing so well, I don't want to disappoint anyone by telling them how difficult things have become.
I feel sick.
It's been a month and a few days, but I don't think I can get through today. I really don't.
Last edited by zowie : 23-09-2008 at 05:28 PM.
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- x Plumeria Sister x - Forever thankful to RYL <3
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23-09-2008, 10:36 AM
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#2
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Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: London area
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What're you frightened of?
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23-09-2008, 11:33 AM
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#3
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The Shadow of the Day
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Scotland
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I'm sorry to hear that things have become hard for you, has something happened that might have led to this deterioration? I'm sure you wouldn't be disappointing anyone if you let them know how things are for you, they won't want you to be going through this on your own. What is it about today that makes you feel like you can't get through? Please take care. I'm here if you need anything.
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I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.
You didn't come this far just to come this far.
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23-09-2008, 12:02 PM
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#4
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I was scared of self harming.
I slipped up, quite badly. I self harmed a lot and it's still bleeding.
I called my CPN who came over and was nice to me. He said I have a lot on my plate at the moment and it's probably the stress of everything making me feel weaker against Beth.
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- x Plumeria Sister x - Forever thankful to RYL <3
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23-09-2008, 01:45 PM
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#5
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Bringing back the lost art of Sewing
Join Date: Sep 2007
I am currently: 
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Saying a prayer for you Zowie.
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My husband is my best friend.
In forgiving others, we are not exonerating them. They may not deserve exoneration. Rather, in forgiving others we are giving up our anger over the fact that what happened is not what "should" have happened or that our life is not the way it "should" have been.
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23-09-2008, 01:50 PM
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#6
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Thank you Susan x
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- x Plumeria Sister x - Forever thankful to RYL <3
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23-09-2008, 05:24 PM
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#8
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I've messed up bad. They're all up my arms, like all the way up to my shoulders, all up my legs from my ankles to the top of my thighs, and all over my stomach. There's blood everywhere, maybe I should go to A&E x
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- x Plumeria Sister x - Forever thankful to RYL <3
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23-09-2008, 05:42 PM
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#9
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Waste of Life
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Devon
I am currently: 
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*hugs* hunni it sounds quite bad...maybe a&e would be a good idea...
*hugs* thinking of you xx
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"People have abused you lots in the past? Why do you then abuse yourself more?" - Quote
Sometimes I feel like I'm alone, Sometimes I feel like I'm not that strong, Sometimes I feel nothing at all, Sometimes I feel vulnerable, Sometimes I feel a little fragile RYL FAMILY-
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23-09-2008, 05:42 PM
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#10
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carla1983
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Hertforshire
I am currently: 
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please call someone to take you to hosp sounds like u need help hun let us kno how ur lots love xx
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23-09-2008, 10:17 PM
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#11
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It's okay. I have a supersoaker.
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Over there and to the left
I am currently: 
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Go to A&E honey. you're under a fair bit of stress and when things get like hat it's very easy to slip back inot bad habits. *cuddles*
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"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
- Dr. Seuss
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24-09-2008, 12:15 PM
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#12
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Didn't go to A&E, took my meds and went to bed. Slept badly, woke up about ten times because she was shouting at me.
Came to college today and couldn't hear my teacher over Beth and then I heard a male's voice talking to Beth about me.
Am I going even crazier? x
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- x Plumeria Sister x - Forever thankful to RYL <3
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