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im pathetic
i hate bipolar. i cant figure out how to control it and what's worse is when i come on here and read about everyone else's problems it makes mine seem like nothing. Im pathetic and useless and i've screwed up my whole life and i have no intention of fixing it...i dont believe i can fix it. My problems seem nothing compared to people constantly hearing and seeing thing, while i do see and hear things every now and then more lately than ever it seems nothing compared to how much others see and hear. I messed up. I didnt use the psychologist and psychiatrists like i should have. Now i cant go cause we dont have the money and mom cant take off work to take me not to meantion we have tried to get help and we just cant its not an option right now. I feel like i **** in my mess kit(hopefully ppl will know what that sayin means) i had help and i refused to use it and wishing i had used it right, wishing for a second chance but even if im given i second chance ill probably mess that up too. So yeah bipolar messed me up but i messed me up too. And i feel horrid. Sorry this was such a mess in typing and i think there is about a billion run on sentences but my head is spinning and i cant think straight.
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