Hi,
Thanks for the advise but I'm still stressing
My parents did pay for the plane tickets and accomadation for us to go to my sister's wedding so it would be very hurtful if I didn't go. It's just that it still costs us money to get to and from Sydney airport (4 hours away). They also paid for accomodation for me, my wife and a very close friend to attend my grandfather's birthday. But the thing is that it's over 1000km away and petrol in Australia is like $1.70 per litre and rising. It would cost us at least $300 in fuel alone for the birthday and $100 for the wedding. And we have to pay for food, my wife is down on pay from not working then and we still have our rent and bills to pay. Plus there will be at least 2 motel stays that we would have to pay for during the trip.
I don't want to ask my mum or dad for money at the best of times. And they are already paying tens of thousands of dollars for all these things. A couple of years ago they complained that me and my wife cost them more money than my sister, her partner and my cousin (who is the one my dad really treats like a son) put together. First of all that is an absolute lie. Each one of them has cost my parents more than double what we have. My sister and her partner lived under my parents roof and ate their food for over 5 years. And my dad does everything for my cousin. He got him a $80k a year job while I remain unemployed. And my cousin had my mum babysit his kids for god knows how many years. The justification my dad uses is that my cousin has no father. His dad (my dad's brother) died in a car crash in 1980. My parent are probably are struggling to manage too. It annoys me how they do everything my sister wants for her wedding. I know it's a special occasion and all but to give her an extravagant wedding in the tropics while we struggle to pay our rent and food is so unfair. I don't think that everything should be left to the bride's parents to pay. That tradition is for the dark ages. It's the 21st ****ing century for god's sake. My wife and I had a garden wedding at my wife's aunty's place with about 25 guests. Our wedding car was our shitty Mitsubishi Magna. I felt like all of my life I have played second fiddle to my sister. As a child I found myself copping the belt from my parents several times for things my sister did, but they believed her and not me.
The friend that lent my wife $100 is really close to me. She literally saved my life 7 years ago, when I was going to kill myself after I discovered my girlfriend at the time was still sleeping with her ex. My mum and dad didn't really give a **** that I was suicidal. I don't want to lose such a close friend over $100. I would rather go without food for a month to save the money to give to her than lose her. The thing is that I suspect her partner may have ill feelings towards me and my wife although he's never said anything to us about it. He also doesn't treat my friend right but I don't want to interfere in the relationship. I don't know what it is he has against me. I don't know if he suspects that we may have been more than friends. Our friendship has always been entirely platonic and always will be. Besides that I have never ever had a one night stand, cheated on anyone or had 'friends with benefits'. I have never ever been intimate with anyone that I wasn't in a relationship with and I never will. The average man has had 17 sexual partners, I have had 3. It just isn't me to be involved in that sort of thing. One girl who I used to chat to online before I met my wife accused me of being quote "a ****ed up homo" because I wouldn't sleep with her even though we had never met. Even though I am straight I felt extremely hurt and offended by that so I blocked her straight away.
I have tried to get into other job agencies and unless the pension conditions are changed, I don't have a chance. I have only one option at the moment which is a support program that offers work experience for people with a MI. I will be going to an information session with them on Monday morning to find out more. When I am feeling less depressed I might be able to gather up the courage to go door knocking for jobs but at the moment just the thought is going to make me panic.
I feel like I'm slowly sinking into quicksand
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