I'm just finding it really hard to keep all my energy on keeing on going i just feel its all pointless to keep going i have taken the decision to stop going to the drs and the shrinks as i dont think they are helping or even believe me which is just creating me to feel worse than i am after my consellor 7years ago i knew what it would be like and things havent changed much in the nhs, i just want to go back to hiding away from the world as that way it cant hate me and i cant hate it, taking myself out of the equation it cant hurt me and i cnat hurt it i just need to keep cutting and bottle it all up i know it will all go away.
locking myself away from people online and in real life is the only thing i can do to keep people safe
I'm so sorry that things are difficult for you right now. I can understand why you are feeling that it's pointless to keep going when the people who are supposed to be helping you aren't doing much for you. Maybe you need something else in your life to make it worthwhile. What makes you think that no one believes you? Are you able to raise your concerns with your GP and perhaps see someone else who might be more accepting of your problems?
You've been going through this for a long time, you're bound to be feeling pretty hopeless but there is always hope even if you can't see it. If you keep looking for support and a way forward you could find that hope but by stopping seeing people and hiding away there is no way that you can move forward. I know that it's a scary world and it seems safer to be inside of yourself but you'll only end up feeling more trapped.
Are there any things about the world that you don't hate? Can you add things to your world that might make it at least a little bit better? Cutting and bottling things up won't make them go away, it might numb the pain for a while but it's likely that everything will build up inside of you and make things worse in the long run. How else can you keep people safe without being away from them altogether?
I really hope that you can find a way through this. I'm thinking about you, get in touch if you need anything. Take care.
I put it down on paper and then the ghost does not ache so much.
Don't try to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.
i think its because im not ready to open up fully or when i tell them i went to jump off a bridge my dr went oh well you didnt so i thought stuff you and im not going back, at this moment im not ready to go to someone else as it too so much to go to these people to get help.
i have a very bad paranoia which makes me think everyones whispering and laughing at me which leads me to feeling worse i cant see anyrhing yet that the world offers that makes me happy and im nearly 23 which makes me feel useless aswell everyone i know at my age or younger have made stuff of their lives and i havent, if i lock myself away from people i wont hurt them anymore people i know i always hurt
I know how it feels to think everyone's making something of life and you're not. It's hard. But don't give up, trying to make something of your life and trying to find help, things will fall into place eventually.
You need to be as honest as possible with your doctor, if you feel they're not listening or caring, get a new doctor.
Take care of yourself xxx
Your not useless Duff :( I wish there was something I could do, just know I'm always here for you, and I can always give you hugs :) *huggles* Stay safe ok...
