thank you so much. you have definitely given me a new perspective to focus on. i truly appreciate it. i just wish i wasnt so freaking emotional about everything. but thank you very much.
much love.
xx
i give up.
my sister was supposed to be going to help my mother with the preparations because obviously no one thought i was capable.
well...my sister went out last night and is "tired".
so i offered to go but that wasnt good enough.
mom is complaining that i wont be able to do everything my sister could.
yeah...im still just "crazy" rachel to everyone.
**** this.
i'll show up for the wedding but im so god damn low right now...i dont have the sense to scoop poop.
Location: Denial Tent, Virtual Psych Ward Campsite, MA, USA
I am currently:
honey you can do it
im sorry i dont think i can give a proper response but i am sure that you were amazing
what your mom said was harsh but take it with a grain of salt
i am sure that today was really stressful for her and she probably didnt mean it
maybe your sister backing out just threw her plans off track and she reacted poorly
look afteryourself
Oh hun, I am so sorry... I wish I could offer some advice but I'm feeling pretty crap right now and don't have much to offer.
Please take care.
(((((Hugs)))))
Alyssa
I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
~ Marilyn Monroe
thanks guys....
i have just gotten home...it turned out to be an all day event.
i realize that i seemed incredibly selfish in that last entry and im sorry.
my mom is now married!!!
i am very happy for her.
it was very special and i DID get to help out alot. i was in charge of the music. :)
now its just my brother and i back at home. hes already started his usual.
i plan to act as if he doesnt exist if he keeps treating me this way.
anyhow....im tired so hopefully will be able to sleep tonight. but i have to stay up until my grandma and uncles get here. they are staying the night with us so they dont have to drive home so late. they live out of town.
Im really sorry because you are a dear friend of mine and for the past two weeks or so Ive been walking around with blinkers on or Ive know and didnt remember knowing or something or other. But I dont think Ive been about for you during times and I dont know why I havent.
glad yougot thru it hun. I hope your brother lays off...but they arent usually great at that are they?!
Good for you for making it thru.
take care hun
romp
Well I'm glad you got through the day. Maybe your mom being married will be able to give you enough distance from her and enough closeness to her at the same time. When you don't live with someone it seems to be easier for them to actually talk to. You'll be fine though. If you've lived so long without her before and maybe you can do it again. Actually I know you can do it again. Good luck.
