Triggering (SI/ED) - i just cant take this

deadtotheworld · 12-08-2008, 06:28 PM

i dont know what to do,
i just want to die
i know how wrong and selfish that sounds- im 2 months pregnant, i want the baby and should be able
but im not
all im doing is crying

i need to cut so badly, i want these feelings to go away, i just scared that if i cut, i wont be able to stop.

i just feel so alone

i know i should be puting my unborn childs needs first, but im so scared, im going to get so fat. i want to make my self sick but what if it hurts the child, im so confused and dont know what to do.

i havent got any famliy, and the child dad isnt around, i dont even have a proper place to live

i make sure a mess off everything, now im about to mess up a innocent childs life too

i dont know if i can do this

deadtotheworld · 12-08-2008, 07:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Crazy Rabbit Lady

It sounds like things are very conflicted and desperate for you right now. Do you have any professional support? It would be worth getting som if you don't have it, or if you do have it, it would be worth asking for more.

no i dont have any proffesional suport, i used to years ago
didnt help much though. im scared that if anyone knows how i feel and whats going on with me, they might encorgane me to put the child up 4 adoption or something as i wont b a good mum

effervescence · 13-08-2008, 09:45 AM

adoption is hardly ever encouraged due to the number of children waiting to be adopted who never reach good homes and the fact that a child is almost always better off with its parents. i'm sure you will be a good mum, this is all just very new to you and a bit of a shock. remember the baby support thread is there in vets general if you have pregnancy questions.

blondiebear · 13-08-2008, 05:32 PM

I don't have any advice. Want to let you know that you are being heard by another person.

*hugs you*

Yellow · 13-08-2008, 06:09 PM

i understand your fears.
i got pregnant at 19.....and was so scared. i stopped harming and other harmful things because i was worried for my baby. its obvious that you will be a good mother when youre already worried about your child and you havent even had it yet. very good signs hunni. there are plenty of people with mental health issues that raise children. if you go to a professional, they should see it as you trying to get help and thats a GOOD thing.
i wish you the very best,
keep posting as you need/want to.
*snuggles*
loves.
xxxxx