The Scariest Old Lady Ever *UPDATED WITH BONUS CHAPTER*
Ok, so technically this should be in the CC, however, I want to share this with you all as sort of an ongoing, humorous, uplifting thing.
This is the story of one of the scariest old ladies ever to exsit, how Aidey and friends became her neighbour, and the ongoing saga of the craziness that ensued.
Part 1
So, in April of 2006 Aidey and her roommate Serena moved into out new apartment. It was this HUGE flat in a building that had 4 other flats. We were on the main floor and there were 2 flats under us, and 2 above.
On the very first night I'm moving in to my bedroom, and hanging up clothes in my closet with music playing quietly when suddenly....
BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG.
I jump and look around in fright, as I am the only one in the flat. I turn off the music and wander out into the living room.
BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG.
I jump again, and realize the noise is coming from the side door of my apartment. I open it tentatively, as there is no peep hole, and the flat, while gorgeous, isn't in the best part of town.
Standing there is an elderly woman, who appeared quite non threatening (little did I know how wrong I was).
I inquire if I could help her, and she, in a voice reminiscent of a badly tuned violin, informs me that my "banging around" is too loud for her. She lectures me about respect, and how the last people that lived there were horrid and she had such high hopes we would be better than them. I apologize profusely, and ask her to show me whereabouts her bedroom is so I can avoid hanging clothes loudly over it. She looks around and indicates the corner of the apartment EXACTLY opposite the building from my closet. Probably close to 15 meters apart, at least.
I refrain from pointing this out, send her to bed, and assume this is the last of my problems, again, little did I know just how wrong I was.....
In the following days I recount the story to my roommate Serena, and, lacking a name, we dub the woman the scary old lady, a moniker that has stuck until this day. We decide that it was probably just her being ornery and we won't have to worry about her again. Again.......very very wrong (anyone sensing a theme here....lol)
Anyway, I lived there for another month before going away to school, and in that time she made her presence once more to complain about the noise while we were watching TV one evening.
Last edited by Amaryllis : 18-11-2008 at 05:03 AM.
Reason: Changing the title like Aidey, the person who started this thread, asked.
Well it breaks my heart to see you this way,
The beauty in life, where's it gone?
And somebody told me you were doing okay,
Somehow I guess they were wrong.
I haven't got any 'scary old neighbour' anecdotes to share, except for the time a few weeks after I moved in a couple of my neighbours (I too live in a complex of four apartments) came round on account of me being, "Abnormally quiet, for a young single man." :P
In the beginning of May 2006 I left Serena home alone to complete some schooling in another state. This is when things really started to get crazy. A couple of weeks after I left Serena was at home at about midnight with 2 friends chatting about life in the kitchen, which was over the other downstairs apartment, and not the scary old lady's apartment, when she hears....
BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG
Serena, who is not a fan of confrontation, decides to not answer the door and her and her friends duck out of sight in the kitchen. She hears the outside door open and 30 seconds later sees the scary old lady peeking through dining room window!! Then she starts yelling at my roommate through the window, telling her that she knows she is in there and they better answer the door!
Needless to say my roommate did not answer the door, and the scary old lady eventually left.
While I was away there were several more lovely incidents. A friend of ours, David, had to move out of his place suddenly and stayed at my apartment with Serena. One night while he was ASLEEP the scary old lady came up stairs, knocked on the door, woke up him and told him he was being too loud. He was not happy, and he is a lot less tolerant of annoying people than Serena, and when he answered the door the SOL began screeching at him without him even saying a word. He rapidly tired and this, said "good night" and shut the door in her face. She responded to this by raising her voice, demanding he open the door, telling him she knew he was in there (well duh) and banging on the door some more.
Well it breaks my heart to see you this way,
The beauty in life, where's it gone?
And somebody told me you were doing okay,
Somehow I guess they were wrong.
*giggles* scary old ladies rock! lmao she's prolly making her own noise and then forgetting it was her so blaming it on you! Just call the cops and say you're being harrased! :P
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
I come home at the end of July 2006 and David finds his own place. Thus far, the SOL has come up stairs about 8 times. After I return home her presence at our door increases to at least once a week. Her appearance has morphed from that of an eccentric old bat to that of the bride of Chucky when she is 80.
Seriously. This woman is about 5 feet tall, would come up stairs in a dressing gown, her hair a disaster, sticking up in all places, and she sleeps in her make up, and she wears the really heavy old person make up. So she would have HUGE mascara rings around her eyes mixed with blue eyeshadow, Erin red lip stick smeared on her chin, and pink pink blush on her cheeks.
Hell, why am I telling you this, here is a picture. This is how she really looks, the only thing I did to the picture was blur out the background and crop a few people out of the sides.
So yeah. THAT is what we had at our door every night. Bride of chucky in 60 years. Seriously.
So, anyway, back to the point. In the next several weeks we are dealing with this woman at least once a week, sometimes more. We did often have friends over, usually David, Mandy and Mandy's boyfriend. Generally we would have pizza, a few beers and watch a movie. We were all obcessive about being quiet, and we never got any complaints from any other people who lived in the building, including the other downstairs neighbours.
We all HATED answering the door and would often fight about who had to deal with her when she knocked. After the 2nd or 3rd time we decided to be devious, and enacted a rule that no one could answer the door twice in a row. That way each time she came up stairs there would be a different person at the door, while anyone else in the apartment hid. We managed to keep this up for a while, and eventually every one of our friends had answer the door and we made it to about 8 visits before we repeated a person.
Oh man did it drive her crazy! She would holler and ask "what kind of business are you running here" demand to know what was going on, and in an interesting turn, she began to lecture us about the young children and dogs we had running around our apartment and were barking.
"Strange" you say "I never knew Aidey had children or a dog" well, THATS BECAUSE I DON'T!!! We had a cat! One small 8 pound CAT!
No matter how much we explain this to her, and even at one point show her the cat, she continued to insist we had small children and a dog.
Eventually our landlord gave us a call to let us know she had been complaining. We explained that she was convinced we had dogs and children, and we had neither, and he was really good about the whole thing, and explained that the previous tenants had problems with her too, but he couldn't evict her for various reasons.
Well it breaks my heart to see you this way,
The beauty in life, where's it gone?
And somebody told me you were doing okay,
Somehow I guess they were wrong.
“The good things don’t always soften the bad, but vice-versa, the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant.”
“Nobody important? Blimey, that’s amazing. Do you know, in nine hundred years of time and space I’ve never met anyone who wasn’t important before.”
“If it’s time to go, remember what you’re leaving. Remember the best. My friends have always been the best of me.”
Well it breaks my heart to see you this way,
The beauty in life, where's it gone?
And somebody told me you were doing okay,
Somehow I guess they were wrong.
Oh yes, much, much worse. So far this is only like the first 1/2 of the story.
Well it breaks my heart to see you this way,
The beauty in life, where's it gone?
And somebody told me you were doing okay,
Somehow I guess they were wrong.
“The good things don’t always soften the bad, but vice-versa, the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant.”
“Nobody important? Blimey, that’s amazing. Do you know, in nine hundred years of time and space I’ve never met anyone who wasn’t important before.”
“If it’s time to go, remember what you’re leaving. Remember the best. My friends have always been the best of me.”
