Omg... I finally got in touch with one of my friends and was having a conversation... I just wanted support... and I said something like this:
"I am... and it doesn't matter... I can't fix this... I'm just too f*cked up..."
And he said:
"no you aren't you are just whining."
And now I feel worse than before... I mean is it just me or does that seem a little mean?
He's never been anything less than supportive and caring, but now I feel like he doesn't care and if he doesn't no one does. I need someone to talk to because I'm feeling even worse than I was earlier...
*cuddles*
I wouldn't say you were over-reacting hun, but perhaps you caught your friend at a bad time. No one is perfect and sometimes we do snap at those we care about even when they are asking for support. Please don't take this one thing to prove that he doesn't care, try and keep yourself safe tonight hun and give him a call tomorrow?
Thinking of you
Xxxxx
You see a mouse trap
I see free cheese
And a ****ing challenge
I'll try... i just don't know... i felt pretty bad before and now I just feel worse...
I know sometimes things like that happen... but I don't know... it just hurts... kinda like he kicked me when I was down. I don't think I'll do anything tonight, because my parents are here but I'm worried about ODing tomorrow because they won't be here and there's plenty of things I could use...
I'm sure he's aware of my situation... and in the past he's always been extremly supportive... but i don't know.
I want to try talking to him again today, but I don't know what to say.
I'm really sensitive, and that really hurt me...
That sounds really mean of your friend... but sometime people don't understand and thats how people react.. I know its sounds stupid...
But i agree that can make things feel 10 times worst... But you can get through it safely hun... you have a choice whether you are going to hurt yourself...
*cuddles*
Say what you feel hun, if he's stand-offish again ask him what's up, perhaps there's something going on with him that you don't know about that's putting him on edge.
Take care hun
Xxxx
You see a mouse trap
I see free cheese
And a ****ing challenge
Maybe... I just don't know...
Ugh... now I'm kinda afraid to talk to him... I don't want it to be awkward. But I really feel like I'm kind of all alone now. He was just abou the only support I had...
You're not all alone hun, whatever he's got going on he's been a fantastic support to you and someone doesn't just stop caring out of the blue.
If you don't feel ready to talk to him, maybe give it a wee bit more time. Perhaps do something nice for yourself to lift your mood? Have a good pampering session, make yourself your favourite meal or watch one of your favourite movies? Something to distract yourself and take your mind of things for abit.
*hugs* things will sort themselves out hun, don't worry.
Xxxxxx
You see a mouse trap
I see free cheese
And a ****ing challenge
Perhaps he doesn't realise how sensitive you are, and that what he said hurt you. He is trying to be supportive, but it can be difficult for those we turn to at times as they don't know the right things to do or say, and some things they say may trigger.
I know I was hurt when my boyfriend once referred to my depression as "mardyness" so I retreated more into myself and kept my feelings from him. Don't worry, you will get through how you are feeling now. I wish you all the best x
