always arguing with my dad, grr

DrunkenButterfly · 19-06-2007, 08:58 PM

Ok well for a long time now me and my dad have been arguing over everything. sometimes its just a littel argument thats quickly forgotten but more often it gets really heated and i have t run out the room crying and probably throw something and its just awful. every time it happens he does nothing to appolgise just goes and stis back in front of the tv as if nothings happened. so every time my mum makes us have some kind of discussion to sort it out and hes ridiculous saying its all my fault and that he likes to wind people up on purpose then laugh in their face wen they get annoyed. so i decided to be gorwn up about it and say we cant talk about religion, mental health, politcs,m crime and punishment, you get the idea, lots of topics. and what does he do, purposefully bring up one of the topics at dinner. i try sooo hard not to rise to it but then if i dont i know itl play on my mind and i hate those feeling of anger and frustration staying inside, its not good for me, or anyone really. im just complete lost about what to do about it and i dont have much energy left to argue or try to keep the peace. any advice would be great from people whov had this problem or anything. thanks, sorry was longer than i intended!
Stefi x

lostdoll · 19-06-2007, 10:53 PM

Well...you're being adult about it, doing your very very best to deal with the situation, and I think fair play to you, well done. But there's two people involved with this, and without his co-operation, it will be very hard for you to fight this on your own. My only suggestion is family counselling. I know your mum has tried her best at being referee, but maybe it would help to get a professional involved? Something to think about anyway. Family is too important...it's definitely worth getting these things sorted as soon as possible.

Think about family counselling, if you'd like to give it a go, speak to your mum about it, and maybe she could suggest it to your dad. He might listen to her? I don't know. I hope things work out.
xo

raistlin · 20-06-2007, 11:06 PM

You are not alone in this. You definitely are being the adult which is great! When he starts making you angry can you perhaps write down what you would have told him, so that way you are venting but not making a big deal out of it? He's only talking about things that you don't want to hear about because he wants your attention. If you don't give him the attention he should eventually stop. If not, I would try the family counselling idea. Good luck! :)

DrunkenButterfly · 21-06-2007, 11:04 AM

thanks to both of you! thats really helpful with the idea about writing down what id say. i might suggest the family counselling to my mum but i know my dad would never do it, but we'll see how it goes. im going away to uni in september anyway so not longer do i have to put up with it!