well all looked well for the ed unit.
untill...doc gets letter which states they g=have NO IP and are more a support for the DOCTORS in workigng with their ED clients...WTF??t
I called her and asked about it and told her what i read on their webaite bout IP, etc. Her response?
WE REALLY need to update that page dont we?
Thyank **** i wasnt i n the office or naywhere near her. I just hung up.
My doc has refered me to a hospital in the next city, which would mean about 3 busses, CROWDED buses..and to be hoest? I dotn know how i can manage that...unless i stone myself on my AA's first...
I dont know hether it is IP or not. I'm going to look at their website, if i can find it and see...but no more hoping.
This has been so difficult; I want to l;ose more, but if i keep on like this my hubby has said he dopesnt thihk he can stay and watch me slowly kill myslef. He doesnt WANT to leave..but to see that, well i dont blame him really.
im such a mess. My sleepers no longer worjk, im doubling the dose and gettign 1-3 hours sleep if that..like now, is 5 AM and ive slept from 3-4 AM and cant sleep anymore. I will around 9-10 but my daughter is on holidatys from school for the whole summer and i haate leaving her by herself while i sleep..but sahe is 16 and well old enough to understand and manage on her own. But i still feel lousy about it.
I guess im gonna have to ask my doc for something stronger/different. I ve tried many and this worked at first,,but TOO well. I was sleeping 15-16 hours, sometimes more. Now....nothing. I tried quiting them for a bit, thought it might help and i didnt sleep for 3 days...things got very weitrrd and kid of freaky; i wont try that again!
I still have no psych or help of any kind, my doc is really no good in SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many ways, but tro get to another one is impossible and they atre REALLY busy, sometimes a 3 hour wait!! O.o
Sitting with all those ppl is next to impossible for that lenght of time and i cat even bring a book cos i cant read anynmore...
Im just..defeated in so many ways...but now i have the necessary meds for a successful OD and itrs getting temopting....
oh i dont know...
I must sound like a whiny bitch who should just grow up and get on with life and quit hurting those i love...
Romp, I wish I had something wise or helpful to offer. This all sounds so awful.
*hugs*
love you
My husband is my best friend.
In forgiving others, we are not exonerating them. They may not deserve exoneration. Rather, in forgiving others we are giving up our anger over the fact that what happened is not what "should" have happened or that our life is not the way it "should" have been.
I'm sorry you were let down by that unit and I don't blame you for hanging up!
I think speaking to your doctor again about different sleepers is a good idea :)
Sorry I have no real words but it is not a whiney or pointless post, you are hurting and deserve some support from people even if it's just 'You can Do it', because you can.
Don't OD, you know it isn't going to help. I know things are really tough but you don't seem like a quitter to me. Something will turn up. Please have faith.
*hugs*
oh Romp....
you arent whining hunni.
im soooooo sorry you keep running into these "roadblocks".
but i admire you so much for keeping on going!!!!
is it an insurance problem that you dont have a therapist? im sorry that i cant remember.
and if you are having problems with your doc...is there any way you can switch to another?
i dont understand why you cant get therapy unless its a financial situation.
i mean...weekly therapy works wonders for me. just one hour a week.
there must be some way you can get a therapist. maybe not inpatient but at least someone to guide you.
please please dont OD. it wont help or solve anything.
as far as your eating goes....could you at least try some toast or something. i went through anorexia at 17......and when i started recovery, it was slow going. i started with a bit of toast and lettuce. just little steps.
please take care of you.
loves.
xxxxx
A little Consideration, a little Thought for Others, makes all the difference.
I Wish I could make everything alright for you. Its not fair that you are asking for help and they are just doing nothing.
You deserve a better doctor, someone who is pro active. Whats the point just weighing you every week.
You must get some differerent tablets to help you sleep. Everything is so much worse when you havent had a good nights sleep. I suffer with bouts of insomnia and its a killer. Especially when everyone else is sleeping ok.
All I can say is that I am here for you anytime to shout, scream do anything that will make you feel better.
My doctor alwasy runs late too so ir ing before i go and find out how long it's going to take! if you can't read anymore have you ever tried ebooks? or podcasts? get an mp3 player and try that? I use those when I can't focus and it's good. And when i use to travel on morning busses to uni and evening busses home, i would put my headphone on to keep the world away from me cause i'm claustrophobic and it use to get me so bad.
i'm so sorry abuot this wole ed thing. it sucks that you've been shut down yet again. what's the website?? i'll have a look for you if you'd like?
With the sleepers, they're never supposed to be long term, so maybe asking your doc would be a good idea?
*huggles* my pm box is always open for you sweetheart. you know that. please pm me when you need to!!!!
*massively huuuuuuge cuddles*
your
jellybean
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
~Phoenix~ is my Little Sister of Awesomeness and Self-Delusion :P Bitter Angel is my Mitten Animad is my Top Trump All Im Living For - Is my beautiful and special daughter who isnt called Kim but will moan if i dont add her :P
thx so much, jusy the fact ppl listened and care helps.
Im scared if i ask the doc for different slkeepers he will say its time to be off htem; but i cant function with no sleep and i cnt sleep on my own..but i will see.
Rach: my GP ref. me to one psych and it was a total disaster, you may remember? Apparenmtly io was dressed wrong (jeans, nice oes, and a nice t-top as it washot that day..but oii 'need to dress my aage' whatever the **** that means)
also, well basically it was MY faul;t i was like this and at the end he said ..I dont want to see you again. since that ...nothing.
Unfortunately my doc has done *some* minor psychiatric work and feels he is qualified to BE a psych???!!! he also feels our ten minutes every once in awhile is good enough.... NO it is NOT!
I so deperately need to talk to someone for longer and someone who will help me help myelf. But he (GP) gfave me a list of names..they were all either private now, retired, or owhere to be foudn. I suppose i could *try* calling a therapist/copunss myslef..but finances ARE an isue..i know they have sliding scales...but im scared and embarassed that i may not be able to payu..but we now have extended medical (it covers what regular isurance doesnt, maybe it cover so many sessions or somehting..i must ask...cos i need somehting)
Funny little pink and white capsules lol...alllll the resy are white, except one is blue....funny...
my pills are green... not that i'm taking them *cough* anyways.
when you ring, tell them that finance is an issue but it's extremely urgent you see someone as soon as possible. at least if you ring then you can hang up if you freak out? yuocan get through this sweets!
what about natural sleepers...
nailz was using natural stuff... whatever happened to nailz? Havent seen her in a long long time.
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
I doubt it mand, as its quite a distance away. But thanks for the idea..ill try calling anyways. But they are mostly for for ppl in wheelchairs etc.
I just...i just give up you know. I have jumped thru every hoop, been early for every appt, agreed to try anything...but there IS nothing...i may go back to psych #2...and just be very careful...he tends to just give me another med when i say somethign new, or whatever...i lost 8 months; they are TOTALLY blank in my head...because he had me on soooooo many drugs!!! and i was tooo much of a zombie to even know it!
But i can always refuse them cant i? but it will be a right bitch getting to him, he's in another city....i find it impossible to believe that there, is NOTHING in our city...which is quite big
I dont know...maybe i just wasnt mean to have help...
Oh one thing that picked me about #2 doc is he would sit sideways and stare at his bookshelf, like he was looking for a good book to read!!!! But maybe he's better than nothing, maybe
just....defeated....and my depression has gone up majorly which isnt helping, the AD's worked well at the start but now seem to do nothing...which is a shame cos they worked so well...but i dont think he can up them, im double the recommended /highest dose already, maybe a combo...oh joy, med-merry-go-round here i come...again.
another kick cos i thought for sure we had found it finally
nuff complaining, sorry
thanks again you guys
romp
(as to the natural stuff, it didnt work for me...but it dfopes for many...its 'valarian root and melatonin)
Ahh sweetie i'm sorry things have dropped so badly for you. It sucks so bad that there isn't anything in your city. That's harsh. I had that problem with where I lived in Sydney. BUt I ended up getting my ass kicked down to tassie and found good ones.
Don't give up. Please. please please please don't give up. I KNOW you can get through this. With the meds it may just be that your body adjusts to them really quick. Mine does that with the pill and it doesn't work for me at all! Along with other multiple meds.
Just DON'T GIVE UP! Please.
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
