Triggering (SI/Suicide) - just really want to die right now.

magatha1123 · 14-05-2008, 08:51 PM

I guess in writing this all I'm looking for is a little support and advice on how to deal. I skipped practice today because I'm so depressed right now and don't want to talk to anyone, especially with Kaylie. Kaylie and I and her boyfriend went over to my boyfriend's house yesterday and we were going to play frisbee but I got wicked depressed. I don't even know why. I cried a bunch. Kaylie and her boyfriend were getting annoyed with me because I wouldn't do anything because I didn't have the energy to do anything, which happens when I'm depressed and is why I'm currently not in practice. My bf tried to get me to feel better, which just pissed me off more and he told me to stay and I did only bc my counselor told me to do the opposite of what I wanted to do when I'm depressed. I had a completely shitty time and I ended up talking to his mom for almost an hour while he played frisbee outside and didn't even notice when I was about to leave. So I went home, feeling shitty, missing my brother, anxious about life, wanting to die, and cut myself, took medicine, and went to bed. Yesterday isn't even why I'm depressed, it just escalated things. The only reason I went to school today was because I had an AP test that I couldn't miss. I'm sorry I've kept going on with this, but I'm so upset right now and just gah. The bottle of medicine is really looking good again.

Fates Reaper · 14-05-2008, 09:08 PM

Hello love,

Im seeing your having trouble with this thing, listen I know its hard to do, but try somehing that takes your mind off things. Im not sure the shape your in, or if you have any medical conditions that would prevent you from doing so, but I know walking is a good thing for me and my gf. Umm, something else could be listening to certin music (classical is great for depression). Umm, oh and also try writing something, anything would work hopefully, I got into D&D and it helps with my depression cuz when I get depressed I think of characters for D&D and stories for them.

Listen I know everyone says it, and sometimes it feels like they dont mean it, but you need to hold on, you need to keep fighting, please. I want to be here to help you, and if things get too bad I wont be able to. Please keep fighting, so I can keep helping, and so we can see you get better.

trina1723 · 14-05-2008, 10:09 PM

*hugs* im sorry to hear things are so hard for you right now

try and keep yourself distracted i know it can be hard but if you find something that works for you then it can help a great deal.

please keep going, i know it doesnt seem like it now but you can get through this and things will start to look up.

take care
trina x

Cazki · 15-05-2008, 12:51 PM

Hey there *Hugs* im sorry that your having such a difficult time right now. Please dont end your life though suicide really isnt the anwser. Please have a think about this before you think about ending your life. Suicide effects the people around you and it effects them in many different ways. One way that suicide effects people is that people blame themselves because they believe that they could have done more to help that person and that they could have been there more for that person. When in fact that person did there very best to help them and was there for them as much as they could be. It often leaves people feeling extremly guilty. It can lead to that person taking there own life because they cant be with out the other person that took there own life.

This link is about how suicide effects those around you http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum...ead.php?t=1405 i know your having a very difficult time but please dont give up you can get through this. Please remember that we are all here for you and that you dont have to go through this on your own. Try to keep yourself distracted as much as you can i know its not easy to find distractions that work for you but there are lots of different distractions you can try such as listening to music, going for a walk, posting on the fun and distractions forum watching a movie, or doing jobs to keep yourself busy. There is also the big distractions list that has other alternative distractions you could try http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum...ead.php?t=1403 please look after yourself. Take things in small steps a day at a time.

Take care best wishes Ian xxxxxxxxxxx