stupid?

[sillystring]

So I had preliminary learning disorder testing done a bit ago. I say preliminary because there's more testing to come, but I'll be finishing it with a different therapist, and I haven't started with the new person yet... I made the one I did a lot of the testing with right up the results and put together a report, which I got to pick up right before my therapy session (I see someone different than the person who did the testing for my normal therapy sessions each week).

I looked at the results. I was expecting the same old typical things I usually get: 314.01: ADHD combined type; 315.00 Reading Disorder; 315.9 Learning Disorder NOS... those are the major ones that always show up I think...

But she had on there Disorder of Writen expression (whatever that is) and affect deregulation (which my therapist says is basically what me and her have been talking about, where I'm very afraid of my emotions basically) and a math disorder too (in addition to the typical ones)...

She MUST have scored the math part wrong... I'm almost sure of it... I've done calculus and all that... and math has always been my strongest skill. Why would it show up saying I've got something wrong with my math? She put together the most complete and thorough report I've ever seen (despite the fact she didn't finish all the testing my school wants) but she's gotta be wrong on the math... I want her to be at least... I've got enough dumb labels on me already... I think she was going to put ptsd on there, but both her and my regular therapist have had to deal with me enough times when I've freaked out after them labeling it as that when I was talking to them... all labels freak me out, but especially the ptsd one...

I just feel stupid all over again now. Even the ones I'm used to seeing are bothering me now... my IQ scores are 93% which is okay I guess... though if it were an exam in school, 93% doesn't even count as an A for some courses. I still don't understand how the tests can be accurate if I'm getting a 93% on the IQ parts but then like 8% on other performance parts... It just makes me feel really really dumb.

I'm trying to focus on the part of the report I did like: she has a paragraph that says "M appreciates adventurous and exhilarating activities, such as snowboarding and surfing. She is also energetic, determined, and outgoing, which corresponds to her busy life. She is likely to seize opportunities and to strive to overcome obstacles in her life." I told her I liked snowboarding and surfing (not that they were exhilarting cuz I don't know what that word means) but didn't say anything about the other stuff in there... so she added it all in... and it sounds like she tried to find some positive stuff to say about me. It's nice that she has a few positive sentances to balance out the 5 pages of how stupid I am. She had a lot of comments in the observation part of the report about how I was fidgety and restless and needed breaks often, I think her saying I was energetic is her trying to find a positive sounding counterpart to that. I half-expected her to say that I was "uninhibited" because there was a question asking about inhibitions on one of the tests she gave me, and I had to ask what that meant, and she had me trying to figure it out for myself, and it resulted in a long, interesting conversation, and she remarked about how I definitely was not an inhibited person (dunno if that's good or not?).

It's just so hard to remember those 3 positive sentences when there's 5 pages of data proving I'm really dumb.

[craola]

Hi :)
Firstly, im going to quote my favourite quote 'Stupid is as Stupid does' which means the most intelligent person in the world is as stupid as the things as they do. You are what you do. There is no such thing as being stupid hun, its not based on how clever you are or how much you know, its based on your actions and your heart ok?
I don't know much about learning disorders, but I think we can agree that you struggle in a lot of places on the learning side. So you're not going to be the next Albert Einstein, or the next Proust, but that doesn't mean that you can't have a wonderful life and the job of your dreams. Theres the whole other side, the arts, the psychology type subjects...so many things other than the ones you find hard.
As for the maths, just because she has put you down for that it doesn't mean all of maths, I read an article once about a mathematician who couldn't add up. If you're at all unsure you should talk to them, make sure you understand exactly what they say.
What are your favourite subjects? Probably not the ones you find hard, there is so much you can do. Look at this list of famous people who have learning disabilities click. And famous people with dyslexia or ADD/ADHD click.

Whatever happens you are not stupid.
You're different, the best of us are :)

Take care.
Aimee x

[88shelz]

hun dont think you are dumb...you just find things more difficult than others. u have common sense and u still strive to learn.

if you are not happy with the test results you could always ask for a repeat, just to be sure.

there are alot of positives about you.
you are unique...definatly not dumb.

hugs xx