Overdose/ Self-Poisoning Question - Repeated anticholinergic overdoses

[Steel Maiden]

I've taken more than 10 overdoses of different medications in the past four years. Mostly painkillers in the past, but now things have changed. Recently the voices have been telling me to OD on an anticholinergic (I read the rules and I am not allowed to say here what anticholinergic), i.e. the antidote to the side-effects of my antipsychotics. I've overdosed on this one 3 times in the last two months. Not huge overdoses, but enough to make me feel very sick (the sickness is undescribeable, its a strange sort of nausea), dizzy and it also makes me hallucinate and feel like I am not on planet Earth any longer. I fear that I might do it again soon, because the voices are telling me to OD on this medication.

Will an OD on this have any long-lasting effects? Brain damage?! I'm so scared. I don't want to OD, but the voices will push me to it, I know. I do it just to please them, to make them shut up.

If I have broken any rules in this post, please tell me and I will make ramifications.

[Animad]

Do you want to PM me with a bit more info about what you've taken before,
the amounts and strengths,
your weight,
whether you feel any different since you've taken them, like whether you feel like you've had any lasting effects,
what meds you're on,
if you have any medical conditions.

KimA