i want so badly to trust him...

abba12 · 12-06-2007, 11:55 PM

I've given up on hoping to get more than one or two replies from you guys, but thanks for the people that do reply, it means alot. typing stuff helps a bit though so i may as well write this out.

I'm in contact with someone again. this person once promised he wouldnt ever hurt me, and i trusted him alot. then when he had a horrible day took it out on me in the worst way and destroyed alot of the confidence i had in myself, and the trust i had slowly been developing. its hard for me to trust. he and i haddnt spoken since untill recently when he added me to msn again. he says hes grown alot, he says hes sorry for what he did, and i want so badly to beleive him, and talk to him about whats going on. hes been through similar things to me and is the only one who ever showed much true understanding over what i did tell him. i want so badly to trust him, but im scared.. i cant go through what he put me through again...

theres more to it but thats hard to explane

bah i dunno

Coffee Addict · 13-06-2007, 01:11 AM

Don't really think trusting him will be worth it if it happened again.

Maybe talk, but to trust...I don't think I would do it

Crysainta · 13-06-2007, 10:18 AM

I really think you need to make him work to earn that trust back. He may not be well enough to trust himself if he let himself hurt you that badly in the first place. Talk to him if you need to, but don't give out your trust willingly.

~elaine~ · 13-06-2007, 10:30 AM

Take your time, people need to earn trust

AMS1 · 13-06-2007, 10:35 AM

Hi - I was told once that "trust" is the hardest thing to build up once it's been knocked down. It doesn't mean it's impossible but it takes a lot of thought, work and time. You can't trust someone who has hurt you badly just because they say they won't do it again. They have to earn that trust and prove to you that you will be safe with them - that doesn't happen overnight or even over weeks. Be careful and take your time even if your longing to be with him is strong - you come first so look out for yourself.

Hope this helps even a wee bit.

Pomegranate · 13-06-2007, 11:21 AM

AMS1 said what I was going to say! If you want to trust him so badly then maybe it is worth taking a chance but take things very slowly because if nothing else it will give you a chance to see whether he has really changed.

*hugs* sorry I cant be more help

Margo · 13-06-2007, 07:14 PM

Why would you give up hope in getting replies? People give what they can when they can. Just give people a chance. Sometimes they may not relate or know what to say.

I hope you make the right decision with this boy.

Matthew

Mimsy · 14-06-2007, 03:56 PM

I had a similar situation..I won't explain it on here, truthfully I feel ashamed of what he wanted. But things have improved between me and the guy. We're getting closer again slowly, but it is taking time. If you want a chat, PM me.