Triggering (SI) - i just cant stop!

[pebbles]

i cant stop fucking cutting myself and i no all my family and friends want me to stop but i cant. they dnt fucking understand that i need this, i need to cut myself, i cant just stop. sometimes i want to but i no i cant!
thinking about stoppin makes me want to cry. im so stupid.... oh shut up!

[Nici-x]

Please dont shut up, its good for you to talk about how you are feeling. Were here to listen. I know how difficult it is to just 'stop'.. its so hard. You have to want to stop. Is there anything in particular that triggers you off to want to cut, something that could be resolved? Family problems? etc..
Don't be so hard on yourself;stopping cutting is extremely hard.. your doing well babe. You aren't stupid at all so please don't say that.
I hope your ok, and if you need to talk, pm me.
Take care x x x

[Chris]

heya pebbles,

its natural to not want to stop something once you have got a dependance on it like self harm.

You're right your parents and friends don't understand that you need it; but are you helping them to comprehend it? I know it sounds like an awful prospect but you need to talk to them about it, even if it is in (sounds crap) a letter saying that at the moment your mental state needs this extra help at the moment.

It will be easier talking it through with friends than family.

Perhaps you shouldn't see it as stopping cutting but taking up loving yourself and living healthily....
do it progressively, take up extra socialising, hobbies or doing fun stuff that you enjoy - taking your mind off your dependancy on self harm...

But most importantly don't be pressurised into stopping because that is a negative approach to healing and will not work effectivly

take care, pm me if you need to xx

[Paperdreams.]

Heya,

I understand how hard it must be when you're expected to stop self-harming just like that. Have you tried speaking to your friends and family and explaining to them that it's not that easy? You could write a letter to them, I know it may sound a bit silly, but it would be much easier then having to talk to them about this face to face.

As Chris said, try focusing on other things in life and try and stop self-harm from taking over. You could take up a new hobby - anything that you enjoy which would take your mind off things.

Whenever you feel like cutting, trying writing down everything that you feel. You could even post it in an RYL journal. Distracting yourself is also a good method of stopping yourself from cutting, so maybe you could try posting in the Fun and Distractions Forum, or go on the RYL arcade.

To start recovering - if it's really want you want - then it would help if you knew what was causing you to cut, e.g. friend problems. Then, by trying to solve the problem you have a better chance of recovering. However, if you try and stop when you don't think you're ready, then this will only lead you to feel even worse when you can't stop. Make sure the time is ready for you. I know it's hard because there's extra pressure from family to stop, but if you're not ready it will only make things harder.

Lastly, do you have anyone you can talk to one on one about how you're feeling? A close friend, or even a therapist? It really helps when there's someone you can talk to and trust.

Take care of yourself,
Nat. xo

[abcdefgpie]

Hey honey.
Like has been said so many times on this site, trying to stop if you're not ready to stop won't work.
And it's probably damaging to try to stop if you're not ready.
Have you tried to educate them about self-harm?
Sorry it's not much help.
Please take care.
xxxxxx

[craola]

Hi hun,
what everybody has said is so true, self harm is not something you just stop. Its a coping method and you have to find another method of coping to replace it before you can stop.
Friends and family often find it really hard to understand and try to make you just stop, they dont understand more than the fact that you are hurting yourself. Nats idea of writing a letter is a really good idea, if you try to get them to understand what its like and why you feel you have to do it, it may make it a little easier for them to cope with and they can support you and not put you under so much pressure.
Are you getting any help for your SH? Going to see your GP can be really useful, they can get you extra support and help so that you can eventually stop.
Try to keep your self distracted and take care
Aimee xx