You asked me my-friend what was wrong, I smiled and said 'nothing' .. Then I turned around to whisper ''Everything!'' ...
Im tired of trying, tired of crying all the time, I know Ive been smiling but inside, really.. Im just dying!
I just know yesterdays feelings will all be lost within time.
An it won't matter to anyone (but me! - still)
I think Im ready to jump now. Like, my time has come almost.
The signs feels like as if they are here now.
My CPN is off Leave from work, An my Support-worker is off up in London today on some training Course.
I can't cope, an yet Im struggling to get through the days anymore.
Can't do this. Can't do any of it anymore.. as it is I struggles to open up to strangers.. it aint easy, it takes time for me.
An right now I really dont have time
Really dont feels safe.
Im so scared of jumping, but I know its something I must do.
Because this is my time - it must be, the day!
No-one's around, my day isn't going well, Ive ran outta money, I have no letric.
I have nothing, Not even Gary!.. An not even my father!
*hugs* im so sorry you are feeling so awful right now.
suicide really isnt the answer, you can get through this hard time and come out the other side a stonger happier person. you can do it. i belive in you.
think of all the poeple that would be effected if you went through with it, you may not believe anyone would but i promise you they will. i would be upset, everyone else on ryl would be upset, so would your friends and family. i know how hard it is to believe but its true.
please take care of yourself and stay strong.
trina x
Next time your friend asks you what's wrong, maybe you should try something new. tell her what's wrong. if she's concerned about you, and she wants to help, and you really want someone to help you, then just telling her could help you both so much.
i feel just like you sometimes, there is nothing i want more to end all the hurt and stress and pain... but i get through it every time, i play music really loud, i take a shower and cry it all out, and go see a friend and cry to her... anything to stay away from being sad in a room by myself because i know that makes it worse. tell your friend so you have someone to unload on, dont worry honey it will all get better soon ...
It keeps happening you guys, an it won't go away!
Its draining me. It's drained all my energy out from me.
Tried hanging myself yesterday, but the rope snapped (See how bloody fat I am! Grrrhhhhh!!!)
It were like someone threw me across the room. Left with scatches on my body, Shaking like mad, I couldnt control myself for a few seconds at that point.
I just wanted to die x
