Triggering (SI) - un-friends

Wabbit · 11-06-2007, 03:52 PM

I have a beautiful little boy. He is beautiful and adorable and perfect and disabled. He has to start school next year, so he had a psycological assessment a couple of weeks ago to work out his IQ and what type of schooling and support will best suit him. I was in the room when the assessment was done, so I knew how badly he had done and had time to prepare myself for the results. They were as I expected and I put on my brave, expectant, logical facade, I was ready for it. I wasn't dissapointed by the results, my son is still as perfect as ever as far as I am concerned. But I am disappointed, actually totally pi**ed off with my supposed friends. The ones who ring and SMS at any hour when they need a shoulder and stupid me drops everything and would do anything for them. The ones who I really needed as a sounding board and maybe a little support because all I really want to do is curl up and cry for everything I now know my son will not get to enjoy in his life. I am not upset about my son, I am upset about my fu**ing useless friends. I am upset with myself for needing them and so angry with myself for needing them, or anyone, and I want to harm myself so badly, and I am going to hurt and hurt until I learn that I don't need anyone. Never rely on anyone because they always let you down. Not true. I expect too much. Why the fu** would they do anything for a piece of **** like me. Stupid,stupid,stupid.

chocostashchick · 11-06-2007, 04:34 PM

you arent useless or stupid
you sound like an amazing mom and a really supportive friend
i am sorry that your friends arent reciprocating
if i were you i would approach them about it in some way
just say that you really need some support, some of the same support that you gave them, and you felt like you didnt get it
i hope that this sorts itself out, and that your son has a great school year
xxxooo

Pegasus71 · 11-06-2007, 04:34 PM

I guess it's at times like that when you find out who your true friends are. I can understand why you're angry, now is when you need support.

I have a 7yr old son and I've discovered since he's been at school how selfish and cliquey the parents of your children often are. I can't think of any parent at the school who I'd really want to talk to.

All I can say is that maybe given time you will find someone who you can talk to. Wanting to harm is a natural reaction I guess, you're hurting.

All I can offer is *hugs* I'm afraid, he sounds like a little star, I can tell from your post how much you love him, so no way are you useless or stupid, no-one who loves their chld that much could be.

Mental Razor · 12-06-2007, 09:16 AM

I want to cry for you, I know exactly how you feel. I just got done ranting the other day about my "friends" I'm there for them, but when I need them... well you know how it goes, that's why I'm on here, looking for friends who actually care, do they exist...?

12-06-2007, 02:14 PM

I am so sorry your friends werent there for you when you needed them.
If you ever need to chat....I should be about for a while.
much love
xx

Destinationzero · 12-06-2007, 04:40 PM

I have a similar relationship with some of my friends. I don't think they're ****...I just know that since I am their rock of support they cannot mentally take it when I have a breakdown. It scares them and they don't know how to deal with it. That's why I found RYL because no one would understand around me what I felt. RYL has been the type of support that I needed when the people around me came up short.

Oh yeah and your son will probably be happier then most people for a long time. I've found that many people when they begin to grow up lose the joy in the small things. My disabled cousin is 30 and she still enjoys things the way I did when I was 10 years old. That I consider lucky.