i feel so bad

[*Stars_above*]

my mate died last new years eve/day... she died of a OD on a night out in london, so the new year just gone was so bad, the reson i feel bad is well because the last time i saw her i lied to her,

i went out for a few drinks just before new year 2006 and i saw her out, she looks so pretty and i went to talk to her as i havnt seen her for ages, and she asked me if i was going to come here for new years and i said yes.. knowing i wasnt, and the next thing i know someone told me she died, i felt so bad because i could of maybe helped her that night or something because i wasnt there i lied.... and i still feel so bad, i know i wasnt best mates with her, i didnt see her that much but everytime i did see her we got on so well. i just dont know how to get over my guilt XXX

[inkyspider]

Hey hun, i'm sorry about your friend.
But you have to believe it wasn't your fault and that nothing you could have done would have changed things.
You may have lied to her, but it wasn't a terrible lie and it wasn't really directly related to her dying.
I hope you're alright.
Take care,
Tabby x

It is so human to think of ones we have lost and think "if only i had done X differently"
But how on earth could you have known before hand? You arent responsible for what happened. You didnt make her OD. You cant be held at fault. So why blame yourself? It was out of your control.
You need to stop blaming yourself. She wouldnt blame you.