AAAHhhh - Why won't they leave me alone?

[ThinkingofRecovery]

So this time, I promised to try and engage with the Crisis Team (the veiled threat being if I didn't, they were considering admitting me). Anyway, they won't leave me alone. They call and come round to see me 2/3 times a day. Why can't they accept that no amount of visiting me and asking how **** I feel will change my plans. I ignored a call tonight only to have them turn up at my door. Fortunately my housemate was in and said I wasn't expecting anyone. I can't stop cutting, etc and I feel so trapped.

Sorry, just needed to have a rant.

[xDYINGxEMUx]

I know its hard but they are only trying to help. Why dodnt you say to them the next time that your not sure you want them coming round quite so often.
It seems like it migth be ptting more pressre on you. Or maybe you could talk to your Dr about it.

Stay Safe
-X-X-

[ThinkingofRecovery]

I've tried to "disengage" but they won't seem to let me this time. They can't do anything to help. I feel worse for wasting their time when I am going to go through my plans in any event. They should be seeing someone who really needs/wants their help.

[ThinkingofRecovery]

So today, I returned the call - you know, the you didn't come to the door last night and didn't answer our calls, call back please. I basically told them to piss off. Then I was stupid and ended up hurting myself, in A&E and having to see someone again. Got really angry as they just keep saying the same thing - we need to assess your mood, it would be a tragedy to kill yourself, what do you think your family would say, have you tried distracting yourself, what do you think we can do...I'm so fed up of this ****. I don't know what they can possibly do to help me out of this. I'm clinging on and fighting the urge to kill myself and they know this yet still insist on asking their stupid questions. But there is no other help. What else can I do. Had to call them again just before and apologise. What is it they think they can do with all their stupid questions.

Sorry, but feel so desperate and don't know how things can change.