I feel really messed up right now-like I don't know what-I don't know what I'm doing, I feel like numb-I don't even know what I'm saying.
I'm so triggered for everything.
I just want to cut so bad-like I used to.
I just want to pass out-I want to forget.
I don't even know what I don't want to remember.
Do you know what has caused you to start feeling this overwheliming sense of numbness?
It seems to me that something else is causing you to be triggered, but since you arn't being able to deal with the underlying issue, you are being triggered by even the smallest thing. Its kind of like the whole when you keep bottling everything up eventually you can't bottle up thing anymore, you eventually just blow. In your situation, you are relieving the pressure a bit at a time.
You seem to be doing a very good job keeping yourself from giving into the urges, lets try to continue with that, please feel free to PM me if you would like to talk. Live Assistance isn't online at the moment, but they are some of the best supporters around, so they are also an excellent resourse to use, as well as is the Fun and Distractions page.
If you feel you are in immediate danger, please contract your local A and E, or contract someone can be sure of your safety. Take good care and remember, anytime you need to talk, Im just a PM away.
xx
Nicole
"Even if hard work and determination doesn't pay off immediatly, it will ALWAYS pay off EVENTUALLY"
I'm not so great. It's a bit of a drag that I've managed to become all depressed during examinations-I can't even be bothered to revise, 'cause I'll just kill myself if they're bad. Stupid, I know.
I'm so exhausted-all the time-and when I'm not, I feel-just so disgusting. Like my skin is crawling,litterally.
I propose we murder the exams, they suck.
Try not to push yourself, please. You don't wanna burn out. I want you to be safe.
The skin crawl stuff I can relate to. But you are not disgusting, I promise you. It's easy to feel like that, it's hard to fight against, but you have the strength. I know you do. You can resist all of this and things will get better.
i dont understand what you need out in the open robyn, im the most understanding person EVER, your talking to one person who really did have a cutting problem, a massive cutting problem, and you know what, not one person i know has seen one of my scars, because its not something i feel comfortble advertising, i just cant get my head round you, like what is it you want? what is it you need?? like every blog you do you put some (edited) depressing name on it when all your doing is fillig in your name and fave websites. And you advertise your fave web site is that recover your life site! man you have no idea how much it rips my heart to be someone whos parents practically disowned her for cutting, and you run round telling the world, man you dont have a cutting problem, or a mental issue, its some serious attention problems, man think about what you post and how it affects others, you wana cut yourself you do that, your the one that has to deal with the scars, then mental and physical ones, everyone thinking your crazy every time they see you, the comments that are made behind your back, but DO NOT throw it in my face that you cut and everyone thinks your great for it. (edited) you have everything, money, great relationship with your parents, loads of friends, you claire and rach, my only friendss, are all going to the kremlin, not one of you invited me, have you ever spent 2 months not saying anything to anyone, cept yes or no to your mum about food, i have, you need to get over this self loathin self harm thing robyn, (edited) and the sooner people start being harsh to you over it instead of going "poor robyn" the sooner you'll realsise its not cool and it causes real problems for real people. I'd be afraid to bring you to my house when my dads in, his mum tried to kill herslf via cutting infront of him about 10 times when he was a kid, then his daughter tried it, he would eat someone like you for dinner man. (edited), think of others (edited), and think about how it makes you look when you post LOOK AT ME all over your bebo
Last edited by typsee : 11-06-2007 at 02:58 AM.
Reason: Post breaches RYL rules - being mean, unpleasant, harsh and overly critical.
-squishes for Robyn-
That's a horrible thing for someone to say =[
We're not sick of you chick, promise.
And no one here thinks you're crazy.
Just because they can't see why you do it doesn't mean its silly m'kay?
xxx
You don't understand-I loved this girl. She was such a great friend-she listened. Apparently not.
Purged.
First time I ever.
I think I'm going to ... (edit)... confront her..(edit)...tomorrow.
Last edited by typsee : 11-06-2007 at 02:51 AM.
Reason: breach in RYL rules of posting - no 'suicide' statements permitted
I'm sorry things are so bad for you.
But no-one has the right to say what they did to you.
That person is ignorant and narrow minded, never feel like you can't feel what you feel. Never feel as if your problems arn't enough or arn't good enough or that they don't qualify or anything like that.
Robyn i am so sorry things have gotten for you to feel this way. you can pull through this tough honey,, please be careful and take care of yourself. *holds you tight*
you are worth sooo much more than the way you are feeling right now. there is no-one who should be able to let you feel this way.
Belt - I'm very sorry that things are so tough for you right now, and that unfortunately these difficulties have coincided with a time in your life when you need to be performing at your best, due to having to study for and sit your exams.
Do you think that perhaps the stress from studying, and having to sit your exams, could be having a negative effect on your mood?
If the stress from your exams is the cause of why you are feeling so badly, the good news is that this can be quite easily fixed ... or at least allieviated significantly.
There are plenty of different ways to manage stress, if this is indeed the problem. Maybe you have been studying too hard, and need to schedule in some regular breaks during your revision. Are you looking after yourself physically? I know in the past when I was doing exams, I would get very little sleep and consume nothing but chocolate and Diet Coke for at least 3 weeks! .... And in the end, that makes a person get really run down and sick.
There are many simple things that you can do that could help you to feel better during this difficult time, and making sure you look after your physical health by eating properly and getting enough sleep, is very important.
As for those crawly feelings you get on your skin - I get those from time to time too ... and something that I found that used to work for me, is having a nice warm shower, and using perfumed soap and one of those loofa sponges, I will scrub my body from top to toe, and then change into a clean pair of fresh PJs. That helps alot more than cutting does, that's for sure! Cutting only leads to wounds, and then when wounds heal and they become itchy .. and having to have band-aids or dressings on your skin, only ADDS to these itchy, crawling feelings. But treating yourself and your body with care and kindness, is a much better way to control these crawling skin problems.
Belt .... to make mention of another issue altogether ...
It appears that on this thread, someone else is using your account.
Could you please PM a moderator to explain this situation?
Thank you ... and I hope you feel better soon hun.
