I'm 24 and i find it really hard to make friends. I think i have about 3 good friends, not including my boyfriend. I have other friends but i hardly see them, only when my best friend arranges something. I'm in college, 1 night a week. And i'm going to university in september, hopefully.
In college i have no friends, they're all friendly and i have no one. I'm scared that when i start uni it'll be the same. Everyone in their little groups and me on my own. Apart of me thinks i'm too old to be making new friends. I really don't know how i can make new friends. My boyfriend thinks getting a job will help, but i can't work at the moment. And i think even if i did get a job i probably wouldn't talk to anyone there. I'm not a shy person, but i find it hard talking to people i don't know. Thats obviously one of the reasons i can't make friends.
When i was little i was always making new friends. I don't know what changed. I think i just got old.
You are NEVER too old to make friends! It sounds like you're already beating yourself up for being friendless, even before you get to find out. Sometimes I find when I overanalyze simple things, it makes them seem more daunting than they are. I think a lot of people do this in a variety of different situations, especially when (like many of us) they are uncomfortable in their own skin. Have no fear! If people view you as approachable, they're more likely to try to get to know you. I know you're a good person, because you are questioning yourself without blaming others. But have faith that your positivity will rub off on others!
I'm rambling and sound like a preacher, yes, I know, but I just feel so strongly that this is something that you can overcome.
Sending you good vibes...
D'Arcy
Nullum magnum ingenium sine mixtura dementiae.
Lambchop, LadyMacbeth, Butterfly525, and Moonchild are my sisters. Ruffle is my daughter. That Faery Kid is my kitty!
I'm 24 with no friends too honey. Try and think of it as quality not quantity and smile at people lots, that's how I deal with it... Big hugs out to you xxxxx
How could you become as awesome as you are and still feel like a loser?
If you have a few good friends, that's all you need. And it sounds like you do. I agree with what was said above about acquaintances. I've often mistaken people for being friends when they turned out to burn me in the end. Sometimes it's not worth it to have friends who aren't good friends.
I love the good friends i have, they great. but i hardly see them. one of them lives like 100 miles away. the other 2 i see like once a week. the rest of the time i spend alone. my boyfriend comes round my house some nights for a couple of hours. but about 90% of my time i'm alone in bedroom. i need to make more friends so i get out more.
I'm a lot older but i have had bad things happen to me off so called Friends ,its hard to trust to make Friends for me ,as Wat is a true Friend ,but you have Friends on this site hey perhaps you is just to good for some people ,passing a hug to you
i dont have many friends i have a lot of acquantences and people i say hi to when i see them most of them i dont really like or have any real comparable interest with them, my good friends i can count on 1 hand you know the type of people you could ring at any time and if you said i need your help now its an emmeregency theyed drop anything they where doing to come and help you, i think personally for what its worth your overthinking the issue and worrying about nothing, you should feel rich in the friends you have and you may have some that you didnt know you had. phrase i always liked was, if arseholes could fly, this place (not refering to ryl) would be an airport......
There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman; some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me: only an entity, something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable... I simply am not there.
I have 3 best friends and a boyfriend. I'm friendly with a lot of people, I have a lot of casual friends.. but i find I'm happier with my tight knit little circle.
for me personally, it has been more beneficial to spend my spare time with people i love and trust completely and wholly- not to expend energy creating fluffy friendships of convenience.
BUt if you are wanting to make friends, if this is something you're unhappy about, I suggest actively working on this shyness around new people. This is a problem i also have _ i'm outspoken and cheerful and silly when i'm comfortable, but in new situations i'm often paralyzingly shy. To avoid this, i force myself out of my comfort level regularly. I'm 20 years old but i just started college ( was dead broke the last few years). None of my friends are in school with me, and it does make the day go by faster when i'm friendly with my classmates. So i'm slowly and purposely talking to people. I'm finding that people really like talking to me. After 3 weeks in classes, I've gone out to lunch after class a couple times or gotten together to study with some people from my classes.still, i prefer the company of my already in place best friends, but it's nice to go out with different kinds of people.
in this whole long winded reply ( sorry for the tangent-ness of the whole thing, i'm sleepy) my main advice is that the only way to make friends is to get over being nervous. how? i don't know, you just have to DO it. you have a boyfriend and close friends, so you can pretty much assume you are likable. know that, have that confidence when you approach new people. :)
Blessing all the birds that died so I could live
be a woman, be a woman
don't be scared of uni its the best place to make friends, in your first week people are happy to chat whilst standing in queues etc but if you feel you can't do that go along to the fresshers fair and sign up for any and all groups that sound interesting to you. If you're interested and happy in what you're doing you will be an approachable and interesting person to other people and even if you know no one else chances are thats true of most of the people in the group so you're all starting equal.
