Triggering (SI) - it hurts

cobinrapner · 31-01-2008, 06:17 AM

it hurts so much. i like her so much. i think i might even love her. but it's never going to be what i want. i burned myself with a cigarette last night just to feel something else. just a minor slip up. nothing big. i just want her. and i want her to want me. at least she knows everything and she doesn't feel awkward around me. i just hate holding back. i want her all the time. this is killing me.

Stellata · 31-01-2008, 08:59 AM

Disappointment can be hard. As can feelings that are more one way. Is it that you feel very lonely? It's good that she accepts you as you are.

here-for-the-journey · 31-01-2008, 11:02 AM

Have you tried telling her this?
Perhaps she needs to know how you really feel.

cobinrapner · 31-01-2008, 05:51 PM

I feel like I've told her enough already. I'm glad she knows and I'm so happy she's perfectly fine with it. I feel like I should distance myself but then I would feel even worse. It's pretty much a lose-lose situation =(

thingy-bob · 31-01-2008, 08:33 PM

shit that sounds so familiar . well it did but just when i had given up of her ever feeling the same..she did .scars and all...so just hang in there because you never know