Triggering (SI/Sexual Abuse) - is it wrong?

Phoebo · 24-01-2008, 03:29 AM

hi

i've got a bit of a personal problem i was raped when i was 15 then again at 18 and sexually assaulted when i was 19

i know its normal that as you grow up you start getting sexual feelings i know its normal but every time i do i feel soo guilty afterwards i just want to cut and hurt myself and i was just wondering is it just me i dunno i just feel like i'm disgusting and i need to be punished for having these thoughts

DUNFERMLINEBOY · 24-01-2008, 04:03 AM

HEYA!

i TOO WAS RAPED WHEN i WAS FIFTEEN, IT HAPPENED AS I GOT OLDER TOO! You are feeling from what I can see exactly the same as I was! You are feeling disgusting because of what the scum bags did to you! IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!! You are wanting to punish yourself becasuse of this and there was absolutely nothing that yoiu could do to prevent it! Please talk to a psychologist or somebody that u can trust about it! It helped me loads!

Take Care,

Craig

sparklyshoes · 25-01-2008, 08:38 PM

It is perfectly normal to have sexual feelings hun. You just have to find a way of realising that you are not in the wrong, you were not the one who was doing something to feel guilty about if you know what I mean. Don't feel guilty for who you are or what has happened to you. You are a wonderful person that has had horrible things going on in their life. You deserve to be happy. Have you seen a counciller about these feelings? xx

pea soup · 26-01-2008, 05:15 PM

i too struggle with these feelings and thoughts.
i think when we we are violated in that way it changes our perception. but sexual feelings are very normal and healthy.
maybe if youre not already seeing a therapist, it might help.
much love.
xxxxxxxxx

27-01-2008, 01:14 AM

i understand the feelings of guilt, but you know what? you are human. sex is a natural part of our lives, and you have no need to feel guilty. you really dont. yeah, you were hurt by a sexual act, but thats not your fault, and you are still allowed to want, and enjoy sex with someone you care about (or hell, that cute bartender thats been serving you c-ocktails all night)

it is really ok to have sexual feelings. its perfectly natural. i know you said you know, but i have a feeling somewhere in your mind you are thinking "its not ok for ME to be having these feelings"

it is though love. you have to work on realising that.

*cuddles*