Triggering (SI) - I've been thinking about cutting

[butterfly hearts]

I haven't for a very long time, but for some reason i've been thinking about it again lately! (for just the last couple of days )

Some of my theories are that:

1) I haven't been picking my skin so much, so im feeling the strain
2) I'm feeling more attractive than usual so it may be a way to self-sabotage.

Anyway, i'm seeing someone at the moment, and we've only been physical twice before, so i really don't want to have marks on my skin.

Kat xoxo

stay strong kat keep fighting the urges try lots of distractions....WELL DONE ON NOT CUTTING YOURSELF THATS IS AMAZING HUUNI...

PLEASE HANG IN THERE BANISH THOSE THOUGHTS YOU CAN DO THIS
PM ME ANYTIME
STAY SAFE
LANA
XOXO

[Stellata]

It's great you're feeling more attractive. I would suggest that you build on and nurture that feeling. It's understandable the self sabotage would kick in with this, but it doesn't have to have the power. Keep taking good care of yourself, let that be stronger than the other thoughts.

[((deleted))]

Hi, it's great that you haven't been cutting lately. Can you try some distractions techniques? Some of the things i find helpful when dealing with self-destructive urges are:
*Rubbing moisterisor/oil in my arms and over scars
*Using a red felt-tip to draw lines over my arms
*holding ice cubes or running them over my arms
*putting a rubber band over my wrist and 'pinging' it once or twice(no more) to get over the urges.

I use these techniqus when reading/watching tv/writing etc don't seem so effective.

Hope this helps. Stay strong

[butterfly hearts]

thanks guys.
It's a big time of change for me.... for once i'm attracted to a guy, i'm waiting for uni offers, i'm on holidays and therefore not busy busy....and then i'm thinking i should be getting a job but i don't have the motivation - **** THAT lol.

anyway....i don't know why i don't want myself to be attractive, or why i don't want myself to be successfull! It seems kind of dumb!

anyway.... i'm just a bit all confused atm.

Kat xoxo

[plastic rose]

It's definitely not unusual to have urges to self-harm even though you quit a long time ago. I've been free of self-harm for 3 years now, but i have had the odd random urge which has made me hurt myself so I know how you feel. Have you got anyone to talk to in real life? Like a friend, a counsellor, a doctor, or a therapist?

[random.swirls]

Is there a reason behind you wanting to sabotage yourself. I think that Sarah's reply is so true when she says that it isn't unusual to want to do it no matter how many years you have been free of it all. But it is important to ensure that you don't act on the urges if you can fight them fight them.

Do you think that maybe you could do some volunteering so you keep slightly occupied or give yourself one task a day to ensure that you are busy for part of the day.

Maybe you can write down exactly why you dont want to start self harming again and when you feel an urge you can look at it and keep adding to it until the change time is no longer.

xoxox