I was wondering...

[Sugar and Spice]

At what point does something become an obsession? And at what point are you deemed a real danger to other people?

[Mimsy]

I've been thinking about this. An obsession is, I think, when something starts to take over and encroach upon your life. An obsession requires somebody to be totally hung up over it and they have to do it.
As for when someone is a danger to others.. I don't know. How on earth do people measure this?

[butterfly525]

I agree with Mimsy, I think something becomes an obsession when it begins to significantly interfere with your everyday life. As for the second question, it might help if you explained the obsession and its consequences a bit (if you want to, of course).

[Sugar and Spice]

Ok, just in case you didn't know, I'm 18 atm.
When I was 13 I developed a friendship with this guy who lives just round the corner from me. He was 31 at the time. At times he was the best friend a person could ever have. The rest of the time it was just all about sex. We argued quite regularly about it, but it was very rarely enough to stop us from having contact with each other. Last November (2006), he was the one that convinced me to go to hospital after OD'ing. But this summer he asked me whether one of my friends (someone I had grown up with) would be "receptive" to him. I was so freaked out by the thought of this guy (who I already had very strong conflicting feelings towards) trying to mess about with her and I told him so. He then blanked me and hasn't spoken to me at all since.
Now, I'm so torn because I miss him like crazy and I'm still really quite angry with him for various reasons.

I can't seem to get him out of my head. I'm having bad bad bad thoughts and daydreams about hurting him just to see if he is human. I keep wanting to email him or go knocking on his door. I'm not sure what I would say or do though. Yesterday I didn't dare get dressed until I absolutely had to because I didn't trust myself to not pop round there. Even coming home at like half eleven that evening was hard because he would have been home and the bus goes right past his house.

Oh God, I'm really losing it, aren't I?

[Kangaroo]

No, i dont think you are losing it

It sounds to be like you a upset and confused. Talking would maybe be a good thing but why not phone instead. or think about what you want to say, write a letter and get a friend to push it through his door. And ask him to write his response back to you. That way you can sesibly communicate and talk about your feelings.

I'm not suprsied you were upset about his intentions towards your friend. Your relationship with him does seem a bit unusual but i dont see why you can remain friends once you have sorted out your feeling about things that ahve happened recently

With regards to your first post i agree with what others have said about obsession. i think it would be defined as thought or actions which interferred with ordinary functions. i couldnt really say at what point you are deemed a danger to someone. i think it depends on the person, their past history e.g. have they been violent before, how likely they are to act on violent of hurtful thought and feeling and also on their mental state. do they suffer from a mental health problem which means they lose control of themself for any reason.

i hope this helps answer your questions and you feel better soon. *hugs*

[Sugar and Spice]

He won't reply to emails or letters. I have tried.