Triggering (SI) - Doctor

[Ragdoll]

I had a doctor's appointment today at 4.20. I've got in a panic this afternoon and needed to cut really badly. I haven't, yet, at least.

Rusty offered to re-arrange my appointment so he's cancelled it and has got a morning appointment booked so he can come with me and go into work late.

I know it's pathetic, its just that it's a fair old walk by myself (which is scary enough), a new doctor who I haven't seen before, at a new surgery.

I'm shaking now and wanting to cut but I don't want to let him down and I really don't want to become a 'regular' at the hospital.

How stupid is this, I'm going to the doctors to go back on ADs, but it makes me want to cut when I think about going!

*hugs*

It is scary going to the doctors, it's good you have some support when you go.

What will cutting achieve? It might mean a trip to hospital, it might mean an appointment for stitches to be removed, it will probably mean more fear and embarassement.

What is it about the doctors appointment that makes you want to cut?

Well done for having the appointment, I hope you manage to get yourself there. In my eyes morning ones are always better because you have less time to stress :)

[hammy]

well done for booking that appointment. Hope that things feel a little calmer for you afterwards. You are doing the right thing xxxxx

[typsee]

Ragdoll - I dont think anyone here thinks you are stupid for having these feelings ..... I know how difficult it can be to see and trust in a completely new person, and it sounds like you are having to face quite a few personal challenges in order to get to this appointment, so I can completley understand why you might want a supportive person with you.

We all have our own fears and insecurities hun, and I dont think people should judge others just because they have different fears to us.

As for the cuting, well done on resisting hun! Cutting is only going to make you feel worse about yourself, and then you STILL have to find a way to get to the doctors and none of your problems are solved - its a no win situation there! May as well face your difficulties head on and without the guilt and shame at having given in to these urges that end up solving nothing in the end.

Let us know how you get on at the doctors. :)

[Ragdoll]

Thanks all of you.

The appointment is for next thursday and I'm going to try not to dwell on it too much in the meantime.

[blondiebear]

How fortunate that you are that your husband is going with you. And that he changed the appointment.
Hugs