My friend's secret... My worries. Help?

[Obsession]

Problem solved~! : 3 Thank you, everyone. <3



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So, yeah... Myspace... Popular thing nowdays, right? All those people posting bullentins, too. My guy friend posted one called Secrets. In it, there are over 100 numbers, and next to them someone posts a secret. I posted mine, knowing that the previous poster could compare the old list to the new list and see my 'secret'. Well, my best friend re- posted the bulletin... And curiousity got the better of me.

I KNOW I shouldn't have. But my friend... she's very depressed. Her secret said: I use her as an escape even though I know she doesn't want me around. I know I should fade away, but it's hard.

She's talking about me. I know this for a fact.

I was worried about her. I mean, what if her secret said that she was going to hurt herself? I couldn't let her do that... I mean, I love her! She my bud, my pal, my best friend! She's the jelly to my peanut butter. >w<

And now I'm worried about her again.

I tell her all the time how much I care for her, in a non- sexual sort of way. I want to take her places and give her things ( too bad I'm dirt poor D X). I want.... I want her to be happy. I hug her, I tell her how awesome she is, I talk to her... But it's like, I can't always be there for her. I live an hour away on the bus, and I usually can't even get my $1.75 to get to her (and it's $1.75 to get back- I don't want to have to borrow money from her). She never talks on the phone, and she's never online. It's like.... I dunno.

I want to help her feel better, you know? She freaks whenever someone mentions medication (especially when she remembers how I was when I was on anti-depressants (sp?) - I acted dead). She's so depressed, she won't even leave her house, and she sleeps all the time. She never wants to do anything.

Should I just try to be with her at all times? Should I let her use me as an escape? What do I do?????

PLEASE!!!! Help me help her!!!!!!

[x-dying-inside-x]

it is hard when you see someone you care about like this.
you need to let her know your there for her and that if she needs you your there.
if you want to talk you knw whrer i am.
take care
xxxxxxx

[KMS]

the best thing you can do is just be there for her and let her know that that you really do want her around and care about her.
x Ashley x

[Shimmer]

I often feel abandoned by my "best friend" she too lives far away and its hard to get together. Just to hear/be convinced that she does care about me and all the nice things you said, to say to her, might make her feel a bit better.

Invite her to RYL! She can find support there, maybe answers to the questions she's looking for.

I hope things get better...

coley. x x x

[Broken_butterfly]

Aah, I just wrote you a really long reply and then accidentally deleted it! I am such a fool.

I was trying, before technology intervened, to say that I've been in a similar position with my best friend and I know how hard it is. You want to make everything okay for them, but there are limits to what you can do and at the end of the day you have to look after yourself as well.

I'd say keep doing what you're doing, reassuring her and telling her you care, just being her friend basically. But you have to face the fact that you won't be able to make all her problems go away. If I were you, I would try and encourage her to seek some professional help. If the idea of meds freaks her out thats understandable, but there are lots of ways to help her feel better without them. Having someone professional and impartial to talk to can really be beneficial, and it also takes some of the pressure off you. Your friend clearly trusts you so she may take your advice. If not, all you can do is contimue to be there for her while gently encouraging her to take some steps towards helping herself.

If you think she might be in danger of harming herself, or if you are finding it hard to cope with worrying about her, you shouldn't feel bad about talking to someone else about the situation. If you're stressed out about it then you can always talk it over with a friend, not naming any names; you're more than welcome to PM or email me any time, I'd like to help.

I hope that you both get through this tough time okay- finding soemone who is the jelly to your peanut butter is pretty special, friendships like that are built to survive! If you need someone to talk to then please get in contact.

Good luck,

Sophie x

[Obsession]

Thank you all for your help. : 3