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At wits end and don't know what to do
I am currently living with my girlfriend and we've been together for a year. She's an international student from China and as fun as the relationship used to be, it has finally turned sour due to rather extreme circumstances. I am no longer interested in being in this relationship with her, but I still act that I am and do my best to make her happy, because she is a really good person with a good heart. However, this isn't even a part of the extreme circumstances. Her student visa ends in a year which means she will have to go back to China. She is Uyghur, which is a group of Chinese/Turkiq people who are heavily persecuted by China for just existing. If/when she goes back, her passport will be confiscated and she might be thrown in jail. It's starting to seem that the only way for her to avoid this is to get married to a US citizen, and to have the citizen apply for her citizenship. She brought the topic of marriage up to me about a month ago and when I appeared apprehensive, she crumbled into tears and ignored me for days.. I was terrified to go home, because being around her while she neglected my existence killed me on the inside.. Which leaves me baffled, because I don't feel that I love her anymore. Anyways, after a week I caved and told her that we could go to the court house and get hitched a week from this day. Well, on Monday of this week I found out I had off work this Friday (tomorrow) and she said we should go this Friday... At the time I said sure, but today (Thursday) she brought going to the courthouse tomorrow and I couldn't hold in my feelings this time, I blurted out "I know it's supposed to be tomorrow, but could we please wait a month? I just feel we're rushing into this so quickly and..." Well that's where she lost it. She rolled over in bed and started to sob once again.. It pained me so much to see her that way, that I told her I was sorry but she wasn't having it.. She stormed off for about an hour.. She's back now, but refuses to talk to me. Do I just suck it up and marry her? I feel that I'll be miserable, but what's a few lousy years going to hurt me? It wouldn't be as bad as being forced out of what you made your home and being put into prison.. I don't know what to do and I'm so afraid of hurting her.
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