Not sure what to do

[whirlpools]

I'm not really sure about starting a thread and I might end up deleting it, buy I'm wondering if anyone could offer any advice or suggestions.

I see a support worker and I do get on well with her, she can be very kind and down to earth as well as good company.

But she has certain ideas about some things that are proving really unhelpful for me. She seems to think (and has suggested) that I had a good childhood and suggestions of certain things I say as just being almost par for the course. It's become an area that's stressing me out a lot and an area to avoid talking about, which would be okay but it's not always easily avoided.

[Cut this bit out for confidentiality reasons].

Like, I nearly died. I mean, she wasn't there when I was child, no professional knows. It was an off-the-cuff remark but even now my heart's racing and I feel sick.

I'm scared to write this in case I say something wrong or in case the response is similar, or to try and approach the situation in case I'm completely crazy.

Sorry this is so long-winded but I'm scared and I can't quite fully explain the difficulties and I'm scared I'm being unclear. I'm not in the best of places in terms of risky ideas and impulses in recent weeks so I don't want to withdraw too much, but also I don't want to risk a worse situation.

I guess I'm hoping for reassurance that my feelings are valid (if they are) and maybe some thoughts or options or ideas.

[Serendipity.]

Hey lovely. I'm sorry you're feeling like this, and I'm sorry your support worker has been saying things that are unhelpful for you. Your feelings are absolutely completely valid, and I can really understand why it's so difficult to hear things like that.

Would you feel able to bring it up with her? It sounds like (for her) they are genuinely just throwaway comments and she hasn't considered that it could be unhelpful for you - but she shouldn't be making assumptions about what your childhood was like. Bringing it up wouldn't necessarily have to be a huge deal - just gently letting her know that your childhood was actually quite difficult in some ways should hopefully do the job. I imagine that your support worker would want to know if she is doing anything that makes you uncomfortable so she can avoid that in future. It doesn't mean that she would think badly of you, and it is her job to manage her feelings about it. I understand that it isn't the easiest thing to do, though.

*offers hugs*

[Unbreakable.]

What Hannah said.

If talking to her is too much I suggest writing a note explaining how it makes you feel. Maybe also think about whether or not you want her to address/refer to your childhood during meeting or prefer her to not bring it up.

[whirlpools]

Thank you both, I will definitely give some thought how to relay that message to her. I very much don't want address my childhood with her in our meetings, we've worked together for a year and a half so inevitably these things come up but they don't need to now.

[whirlpools]

I'm really relieved and grateful for you saying that, Epic, thank you. I felt a bit crazy when it happened. I'll reply properly when I've found some words.