dumped if don't go to therapy/to be the partner of someone with bpd

[Catharsis]

i have bpd. i'm aware being the partner of someone with bpd is tough. my boyfriend has said he can't stay with me if i don't access some form of 'help'. i am floundering massively. im so scared of going back into therapy. genuinely feels like the most difficult thing imaginable. also dude is using my greatest fear as means for manipulation?? i can't work out what is normal and acceptable for him to say and whats just me taking my emotional response to him as fact

im sorry (and aware) this post makes little sense. any attempts at replies would be greatly appreciated

[Ballerina123]

Your be braking up with you may seem like it's your biggest fear.

I guess you need to decide if it's a fear worth facing or weather he's worth it.

[Catharsis]

thank you for your replies, i do greatly appreciate them.

i have been in therapy before. i was an inpatient post a suicide attempt and did manage to complete a course of dbt. i am very lucky in that respect. i fear my following thoughts are going to sound like excuses. i am young and don't think i gave therapy my best shot - just enough to go back to presenting stable. i lost a very close friend who provided and exceptionaly large amount of non professional support at the same time i began my relationship with now current partner and know he is not able to take on the same role as my old friend. i wish he could.

for what it is worth i could probably benefit from going back to therapy. i am profoundly scared and reluctant. i dont think i want to go back to my previous therapist because of large gaps in my honesty with her but again i fear i am making excuses. i have large periods of time when i am okay, and subsequently forget how bad the lows get. i dont think the correct answer is to cencor myself to my partner but it does feel like the much easier option as my illness is affecting him much more than i feel it is myself.

[whirlpools]

Can you put your finger on what's causing so much fear re: obtaining some professional help? There may be a number of reasons.

Apologies if you've already said and I missed it.

[Sycamores]

Maybe have a conversation with your partner on what scares you about therapy? It might make him a little more understanding.

I sadly have the opposite situation, I'm trying to convince my partner why its a good idea for me to go to therapy.

So, I can see both sides.

Best of luck!