Hiting a "depression weeks" - Help?

[iamunbroken]

So yes I get mood swings from my BPD throughout the day, but my medication seems to have kicked in finally to stop them from being intense. Thing is, I'm without one of them (unlucky, no appointment soon, or chance to get the med any other way) and so my depression has gone back to what it was, besides the mood swings. 2/3 weeks with it strongly, 2/3 weeks without it... sometimes a month, sometimes a week. Right now, i'm emotionless, hopeless and motivation-lacking. My therapist is next week, but feel awful and scared this is the time it will last forever, or afraid of another mood swing. Last one was a few days ago and felt horrible.

Yes, I know what's causing this "depression days" but can't change it. That's the problem. I have plans, I have things to do but... will do them, yes... but don't see the point anymore. Might even skip them for now, for... don't know...

But that way my "work" won't get done and I promised myself to finish a "project" by next thursday so have 1 week to get it properly done. This ain't what I need.

Please, anyone help me get off of this? I might get a mindfullness coloring book soon, for the 1st time, but might not work and i'm scared...

[Devil Girl]

My advice is contact your GP or therapist regarding the medication issue.

Other than that distraction during the tough times. I know that isn't particularly helpful. But it is all I can suggest. x

[iamunbroken]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Devil Girl

My advice is contact your GP or therapist regarding the medication issue.

Other than that distraction during the tough times. I know that isn't particularly helpful. But it is all I can suggest. x

I know, that's what my (rude) psychiatrist said "well I can't give you more meds" this was back in july "because we're short on paper, so the appointment is in 4 months and get the meds on your own. bye, call next patient" and gave me medication prescription for only 2 months.
But I can't. You see, my GP, I don't see her because she would only make me feel worse and the health center where she is (my town center) has some rude people and it's completely hard for me to go there without a relapse in self-harm, eating disorder, panic attack or breakdown before, after or during. I hate this town so much, and I can't go to any other center for short money, and my parents know that they don't even want me to see her, since it was hard for me to getting meds from her as that's my psychiatrist "job", according to her.

It's a complicated situation, and social anxiety doesn't help in it :(

I'm trying to distract with games online but only makes me frustrated after a while...