What should I do about school?

temmsmp · 08-08-2015, 08:59 PM

Hi. Growing up I had a lot of brothers and sisters. I am the oldest of 8 kids. I was responsible for taking care of them sometimes. My mothers boyfriend traveled a lot for work and honestly didn't care about them. I had to grow up at an extremely young age. I never had a social life. I never had any friends. Nights where other people my age went out I was cooking dinner, or cleaning etc. for my brothers and sisters because my mother would be too tired to get out of her bed. My mom is having another kid and they don't have room for me. I'm almost 17. So I'm moving in with my dad. My dad is not a terrible person. I love him. But he has always had problems with money. He is a gambling addict. We never had much growing up. My problem is with school. My dad lives in a bad area. The local school district is terrible. It is listed as the 12th worst school in my state. Only 51% of the senior class graduated. It's just a bad school district. There are a lot of problems with heroin. I'm not a bad kid. I have sacrificed a lot. I don't like to complain. I'm not that kind of person. My other option is cyber school. I don't want to do that. My last 2 years of high school and my "childhood" I want to make the best out of it. I want to go out and make friends. I want to make memories. I want to go to a school. I love school. I was that overweight kid that sat in the back of the classroom memorizing the periodic table of elements that people mad fun of. I've recently lost a ton of weight and I just feel good about myself for the fist time of my life. I don't want to sit at home learning on a computer while other kids are out at school making memories. (This is a girl thing I know) but I will never go to prom. I won't ever have a high school graduation. I want make any friends. When I look back on my life I want to remember these types of things. I don't want to be cyber schooled. I wouldn't trade my brothers and sisters for anything. But I want to go out and have fun for the first time in my life. It's either cyber school, or going to a very bad school district. I mean I have aspirations. I want to go to a good college, and med school and become a pediatric surgeon. I might not get all of that going to that school district. I just don't know what to do.

Patent Pending · 08-08-2015, 10:45 PM

Hi there,

First of all, it sounds like you did a lot during your childhood to support your family and you should be proud of that. At the same time, you did miss out on a lot of things that are important in growing up.

Would it perhaps be an option to go to a school in your dad's district and perhaps get a tutor or something? It would allow you to meet people your own age but also make up for any short-fallings in the school. Mind you, while it is fairly low, there are still 51% of the senior class who did graduate and as long as you have the drive and passion, the school shouldn't essentially change your plans.

It of course would be important to consider the kind of people you would be meeting at the school and whether it is those groups you want to fall into. While there can be bad reputations at these schools, there can be people who like you have had no option but to go to these schools but have your eagerness to make something of your life and get somewhere.

Are you currently at school? Perhaps a guidance counsellor or careers advisor would be good to ask and see what their opinion is?

x x x

PoppyLove · 09-08-2015, 11:11 PM

I don't know where you live, but if you have any transportation at all, have you considered looking into schools that may accept kids out of district?

Otherwise, maybe look into local homeschooling. I know you want to have the school experience, but going to a school where you don't think you'll make friends or have a positive experience won't do you much good anyway. But some places have homeschool "networks" set up, where kids get together and go on field trips, play sports, some even go to dances. Sometimes they even connect with local schools so the homeschool kids can be a part of the public school's events (which I don't always agree with, but that's neither here nor there). It may be worth looking into.

Isoverity · 10-08-2015, 01:40 AM

I hate to say it, but your doing a whole lot better than you think. Your probably the best kid in your family and some of them might not like that about you. You have good character and your not quite missing out on as much as you think (though you should be able to do some more fun things without having to be smothered in other peoples dirty laundry). Your also still crazy young. Contrary to popular belief, you don't have to lose your childhood the way most people think. I mean have fun but don't stress. I played three sports, was captain of two and dated the cheerleader captain who was most popular. I should have had more fun but made friends with sketchy people who I would have been better off without. I have great memories of the sports etc but the people I don't miss. A few good friends is better than a whole crowd. Studies show kids who start socalizing and ating latter do betetr in life than the kids getting involved early.

You can still do ok at a bad school. High schools like to scare kids into thinking they are the keys to a future and have to do everything perfect. There will still be good teachers around and you can get your class rank/average up without wearing yourself out. If your grades are ok and you do voluneteer work and activities you'll be fine. If you cant get into school you want go to the one that wants you and then transfer latter. You can take classes at most colleges without matriculting. Then whe you pass they will accpet you full time. You don't have to fall off a cliff in bad high school. Our local school is one of worst in New York but theys till have kids going to Columbia, Harvard, Stanford etc. A lot of schools are bad because the kids and the parents aren't with the program. The uninspired teachers lose interest. The good teachers will still be there and they will like you and want to help you because they like seeing a kid do good from their school.

Just be careful of the friends you make. Friends poorly chosen do more harm than the enemies. Some kids are weeds and some are flowers. The weed kids can choke you off if you get too tangled with them. College is where people break out and shine. I've known lots of bright kids at great schools but still had pretty bland curriculums. College is a big step up in interest value. I never liked studying until college. A lot of kids do well ins chool because they are machines - sharks who are good at memorizing information uncritically and spitting it back. Other kids are deeper and wonder the "why and how" of things. They want to know what things mean - what life means. You're that second type and that's much more rare these days. A bad school won't hold you back for long. Now if by "bad" you mean there is a lot of crime then you want to be careful of that

Isoverity · 10-08-2015, 02:14 AM

I should add kids who are homeschooled etc can still allowed to participate in local school athletics and clubs etc. It varies according to specific states and district. That's how Tim Tebow became a football star in high school and then college. His local school let him play despite home schooling

Tim Tebow’s unusual education

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/...ffyP_blog.html