I don't really know...

[It's just me...]

okay so I haven't been on here for just under 3 years now which I don't know if its a good thing or a bad thing I get urges nearly everyday to still hurt myself,

yeah I have the scars and I hate seeing them most people I'm close to knows what I've been through but there's still some people who don't know a lot about my past and well as much as I don't want them knowing about it they've found out because off the scares.

To much is going on I'm actually happy when I'm out and I enjoy it but when I'm home people just wind me up. I've had such a good weekend and today's just been **** I don't want to see no one none off my family and I just want everyone to go away I'm just rambling on here and it probably don't make sense but tbh my mind doesn't make sense.

I just want to hurt myself and my anger keeps building up and up and I don't actually know how to control it this time....

[Pi.R^2]

Sorry to hear that you are struggling with urges to hurt yourself. What has helped you to resist the urges in the past? Have you tried any distractions?

You say that you are happy when you're out but at home people wind you up- I presume it's different people you are with when you're out than when you're at home? What sort of things do people do that wind you up?

[It's just me...]

yes I am out with different people then I am at home before I use to just text and go on the internet but obvs sometimes it doesn't always help and it doesn't help when I'm on my own I like to be with other people, I don't know it's just little things what they do all the time but sometimes it just annoys the hell out off me.
I do try to ignore it but sometimes it just gets on top off me, I use to have a really bad temperament due to stress and not being able to control my emotions but I got on top off it by not taking on other peoples stress and just concentrating on on me, but the other day it all just got on top off me and needed to open up my mind again but with people who wont judge me so I came on here and blew off some steam, sorry if I worried you. My mind was just all over the place the other day and I'm feeling a lot lot better in myself :)

thank you so so so much for replying and so sorry for the late reply <3

[Pi.R^2]

I'm glad you're feeling a lot better in yourself, and I hope you continue to feel more positive about things :)

We're always here if you need to let off some steam!