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Old 20-12-2014, 01:03 AM   #1
in_BPD_hell
 
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Does therapy bring out your bad side?

Hi.

I apologise for having two active threds but I have a specific question that's not linked to my first.

Does anyone find therapy makes them more vulnerable and brings out negative behaviours (for example I want to scream and smash things up, cry insanely and have increased SH and suicidal tendencies!)?!

If you do, how do you cope with it?
Thank you xxx



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Old 20-12-2014, 07:42 AM   #2
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yes, sometimes.
Its like everything is much closer to the surface and therefore vulnerable which makes me defensive.
Therapy challenges my "pretend everything is super!" coping mechanism. I realize its not a healthy mechanism, but its comfortable for me. Therapy is not comfortable. Accepting that everything is not super makes me go to plan b coping mechanism "act like a bitch and push everyone away". Again not a productive coping skill, also a lot less socially acceptable...



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Old 20-12-2014, 10:03 AM   #3
Ballerina123
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Yes I get this.
I think it quite common because therapy can trigger deep buried emotions and feelings.
I go to a therapy group and it brings up a lot for me sometimes but if i follow the advice I can calm myself down a bit.



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Old 20-12-2014, 10:11 AM   #4
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Yes, when I started therapy I was warned I would feel worse until I learnt the techniques to overcome my feelings. I think it is true of all therapies to be honest.

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Old 20-12-2014, 12:55 PM   #5
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I think therapy can evoke new feelings, bring up old feelings and make you face realities or thoughts you didnt want to admit you had. So its not surprising that you are forced to cope [and in this case it happens to have been some more negative outbursts] in ways you wouldnt have before therapy.

Crying you mention is not unhealthy, of all the outburst you mention, this is probably the safest and certainly not unhealthy, so maybe give yourself some time in the hours and days after therapy to cry and just sit with your emotions and be allowed to curl and feel them. A kind of debrief, you could perhaps write down how therapy made you feel, and anything that it brings up might be useful to bring to the next session.



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Old 20-12-2014, 12:56 PM   #6
in_BPD_hell
 
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Thanks guys.
I'm so scared... Last time I had therapy I got so bad i kept OD-ing (not acceptable I know!) but I'm due to start again soon ish & I'm worried
Glad I'm not the only one... Going to share it with my therapist before we start



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Old 20-12-2014, 01:37 PM   #7
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Right now can you think of why you want this therapy experiance to be different to the last one [more productive for example?, safe?]

At the beginning, you will be asked how you are going to keep yourself safe between sessions and discuss who the therapist would contact if there were concerns. Bringing it up then as you say, you can hopefully make plenty of plans and have support outside of therapy so that you attain your goals this time [one of which I gather is not ODing].

Just because it happened before, it doesn't mean it will happen again, try not to write the script. Its a concern, NOT a prediction.

Good luck xx



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Old 21-12-2014, 12:39 PM   #8
sherlock holmes
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Yes. It get worse before it gets better!



Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back, everything is different…

you once called your brain a hard drive, well say hello to the virus.


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Old 28-12-2014, 10:43 PM   #9
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Therapy only makes me worse. The mental health system Is so messed up. They don't give a dam about there patients. There not for mental health like they say they are. One just fukin moves when he knows I need help not even caring how I am just leaving me to my own devices. Many I say you make me suicidal they don't do anything about it don't give a dam just nod and say okay see you next time NOT RIGHT. Told one I took some pills because I was soo depressed and then it gave me akthasia he didn't send me to the hospital nothing just said It will pass don't do it again. THE MENTAL HEALTH SYSTEM I S****ED UP. Another time it was I m taking bendryl to cope because your hurting me did she care do anything about it nope. They don't do there job like they should. Nope I don't see them any more im soo much better off without one all they do is hurt me and leave me. Maybe you are better with out them.

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Old 28-12-2014, 10:53 PM   #10
in_BPD_hell
 
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I totally understand where your coming from
Sorry you've had such a bad experience.
Do you have any support?



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Old 29-12-2014, 03:34 AM   #11
findingmyself
 
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no not really. My parents are okay but cant talk to them about serious stuff because they don't respond how they should. Im going to university in January so hopefully I meet some nice friends that can give me love compassion empathy and so on.

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Old 29-12-2014, 07:42 AM   #12
in_BPD_hell
 
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Aww glad your managing to go to uni. It's crap isn't it. Today I want to just curl up under the duvet! But I can't. I feel so distressed!
Why can't I ever get better



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Old 02-01-2015, 08:02 PM   #13
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yep :( but in some odd way i guess its supposed to as horrible as it feels.
I'm on a waiting list and i'm dreading getting to the top as i know i need to do it but the other part screams at me no lets just put another plaster on this massive wound instead and all will be fine! obviously i don't think that really works well for most of us so the only alternative is to do it but make sure its known how difficult you will find it so that your therapist can perhaps give you suggestions or something to help you to deal with the repuccussions of it.good luck let us know how it goes :)



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Old 03-01-2015, 11:47 AM   #14
in_BPD_hell
 
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Yea also waiting... Quite scared.
I feel the same - if only sticking plaster would work x



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Old 03-01-2015, 05:07 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by in_BPD_hell View Post
Yea also waiting... Quite scared.
I feel the same - if only sticking plaster would work x
If only eh :( hugs if you want them x



"And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back so shake him off."

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Old 03-01-2015, 05:48 PM   #16
in_BPD_hell
 
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Thank you! Hugs to you too...
We'll get there eh! Well I hope so x



I don't understand myself... I'm searching for the person I am, and the person I want to be..

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Old 04-01-2015, 10:14 AM   #17
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i think it actually depends on the therapist and type of therapy your having i had two lots of NHS therapy where the therapist literally seemed to want to drag me kicking and screaming through all the stuff thats happened in my life. that made me so much worse, so fragile, anxious, and if im honest aggressive. i wanted to lash out at anyone who didnt see my point of view or who i thought didnt really understand me. i left therapy feeling really unstable vowing i would never return. My parents talked me into seeing a therapist again offering to pay for private treatment.

i saw a therapist who was brilliant. literally about the first 5 session we just focused on various coping techniques and..... not sure how to word this but learning how to feel again. it was like i was blocking myself from feeling anything positive. after a total of about 30 session spread over two periods with about a 3 month gap between i can honestly say i am alot better. there are some things i know i still need therapy for but i also know that because of how damaging they were at the time, they will be as damaging to explore now. so i need to ensure i choose the right time to focus on them.

on that note i think that with therapy that is the main issue. we explore the things that have caused us so much trauma, if we have a therapist that isnt responsive to our mood and how we might react to what were talking about then we really do risk being left raw and vulnerable after the session.


i hope that made sense

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Old 04-01-2015, 05:13 PM   #18
in_BPD_hell
 
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It made perfect sense.

Firstly well done to you for working so hard & secondly I am so greatful for your comments. I hope it helps me too.
I have tried therapy before but going to try again... Hope it helps me too



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