Acting in Public

[Miss Reena]

I've had this idea for a while. I hear a lot of people say that they give a fake smile and everyone thinks they're okay, when even their friends do not know what's wrong. They say everyone else can go around and be naturally confident and surrounded by love. Well, I thought a bit and realized: what if some of those people who they think are strong and happy are really just better actors? They may have problems like you, or they might have other events in their lives that they're also hiding.

Alternatively, what if people can see that something is wrong, and are too nervous or unsure to address it? Many of my friends who have "confessed" to self-harm or to having a mental condition seemed fairly obvious to me beforehand. Maybe I'm just good at reading people, but maybe others don't want to outwardly alienate someone by pointing out their scars, physical or invisible.

Which one seems most likely to you all?

[JusC]

The first one is more like me. I suppose that's more common then the second one just cuz alot of people when they feel down pretend that everything is ok and not let anyone tell that they are suffering inside. It's an easy way to getting out of the situation in the first place.

The second one is where u wanna be right now and it's good if u can let people know how ur feeling right now and admit what is wrong in urself and how u can hopefully adress it in the future.

Never good getting to the point in ur life feeling sucidal but these things happen and we can't help and only learn that we arnt on our own and there is help out there so we just need to be aware of the support we can receive.

Nothing better then talking to someone about ur feelings and when they have gone through it themselves. I think that's always reassuring to hear.

[nowhereman]

*Points to sig* I understand the first one completely. I think if people see a smile etc they will just. Believe you're fine because then they don't have to worry or listen to what's wrong. I mean most people (probably including myself) are too wrapped up in themselves to notice something wrong with someone else, unless they are told. I mean no one knew I was depressed for years, I was too ashamed to tell anyone and they just didn't notice. It's not an easy thing to admit cos people generally don't want to know, not that they don't care but they want to believe everything is ok.

As for the second, I think maybe when you've been through it yourself it's easier to spot the signs.

I hope you're ok anyway.

[Isoverity]

Quote:

Originally Posted by An Existential Bird

what if some of those people who they think are strong and happy are really just better actors? They may have problems like you, or they might have other events in their lives that they're also hiding.

Robin Williams was like that. He had issues but was good at faking things. When people loved him for his fake self it made his problems worse. Approving of people when they are wrong has a funny way of locking people in to their problems. Williams actually resented the people who he could fool - and who loved him for being fake. He hated the idea of being loved for doing Mrs Doubtfire again. He hated the role and the people who liked him in it.

People who aren't good at faking are a bit better off in some ways. If you cant hide from errors you have to fix them more.

[Buttons.]

I think when not taken too far and to the degree where, like Jack said about Robin Williams, the 'act' the 'fake' smile become the cause of resentment towards those who fail to see through it within the actor, that to some degree trying to act happier than we are, or to live life as though our problems are on hold, put away can actually be constructive in that we end up distracting ourselves and discourage ourselves from wallowing in our unhappiness and again, only to a degree, sometimes the act can become reality. I know myself sometimes I'll be in a foul mood and the last thing I feel like doing is getting up, making myself presentable and going into a group or meeting someone for coffee ore whatever and smiling and chatting as though the world is my oyster, but I do it, lose myself in whatever activity I am partaking in, if I allow myself to get lost in it, and come out feeling better. All things in moderation really. A little wallowing can do us good, but so can a little acting pushing ourselves.