Hopelessness

[ennae]

I am really struggling with complete hopelessness at the moment. I just don't see any way that things will change/ get better. People offer to help but I don't know anything they can do. I just saw my gp and walked out feeling even worse because ... what can he do, what can anyone do. I don't see the point of being alive and I really don't know what to do about it. I feel like I live for Thursdays when I see my psychologist - it is the only time I feel like things, maybe, might be able to change. Perhaps. I am, however, even losing hope in that. When do I just give up? When can I say it is just too hard, there is no point? Oh and I take anti-depressants. My psychiatrist said I have to accept life as it is and me as myself and he'll see me in a month. The gp says he'll see me in a month too. And all I can think is I'm not sure I can keep going that long. I even told both of them about how sometimes I wish I was dead- actually I think I should be dead - nothing changed.

[Kyaneos]

Hi there, I am sorry to hear things are so hard for you right now. Do youknow if there is anything in particular which may be causing these intense feelings at the moment?

You say you are on anti-depressants; is this a new thing or have you been taking them a while? If its been a while I would suggest getting your GP appt moved closer than a month and telling them it doesnt seem to be working and they may be able to adjust the dosage/try a different medication or contact your psychiatrist for advice with it. If it is a new thing, then what you are feeling could be partly because of the way the medication is affecting your brain chemistry - it is not uncommon for anti-depressants to actually make you feel worse before you feel better and it can take up to a month for you to really see any positive effects.

However, if it is so bad that you are seriously considering suicide then you need to go back to your GP asap and tell them as they cant do anything about it unless they know.

I am glad you see a psychologist; could you talk to your psychologist about how you feel it might not be helping any more and see if you can both come up with something that maybe needs to change?

Unfortunately, psychiatrists are nortorious for being quite tactless so it doesnt surprise me that he said that, and I would recommend that you perhaps use the other professionals involved in your life at the moment to get support from rather than him.

You say people are offering to help but you dont know anything they can do. I understand that feeling, but if your friends and family are noticing you are struggling and reaching out to support you, it might be an idea to try to talk to them. I know talking can seem totally pointless but even just going for a coffee and a catch up with a friend or spilling what is on your mind could help, It wont fix things but it could help to lighten the load and it is nice to know that you have people who care.

[ennae]

Thanks Kayneos for replying to my post. I having been feeling a little better for the last couple of days. Up and down but not so suicidal. I talked to my psychologist today and a friend the other day - both of which helped a bit. I've been on anti-depressants for a while now so I don't think they are the cause but the does might not be right I guess. You are right about psychiatrists being tactless!!! If things get worse again I might go and see my gp earlier. Thanks again.

[Kyaneos]

That is a good idea, and I am glad to hear you arent so suicidal now.

It is great that you managed to talk to your psychologist and a friend, the more support you can get the better.

Good luck.