EUPD and CMHT support

[in_BPD_hell]

Hi

If you have EUPD/BPD (or complicated PTSD) and are with the CMHT what sort of support have they given you??

I know each CMHT is different, depending on resources but I see a psychiatrist for a review on a six monthly basis and well, its just not enough. I am on a psychotherapy waiting list which means I will start therapy at the earliest in December. I have a great GP, but she can do very little for me, I see her once a month (on average), but its literally a pat on the back, she checks my self harm isn't too bad etc.

I feel like Im getting worse, and I feel like I don't know what to do
thanks

[Wonderland.]

What level of support would you like?

I have BPD. I see my CC every two or three weeks depending on how I am doing.

I see my SW once a week.

And I see my psychotherapist once a week.

I have a psych who I see 6 monthly.

I am also being assessed by the Reablement team.

And I go to my local recovery college for sessions sometimes.

[frenchhorn]

I have EUPD as my main diagnosis and have been under the CMHT for nearly a year.
I have a care co-ordinator who is a social worker and an approved mental health practitioner (AMP) she comes and see's me every few weeks, or every week if I am more ill. I also now have a support time recovery worker with the CMHT, he takes me out and is getting me back into doing some things, like we went for a walk with him the other support worker and another CMHT patient around a reservoir. He can come round for a chat too if I am not up for going out, or he will come with me to activities to support me.
I am also being referred to the CMHT therapist as I quit the group therapy for people with personality disorders I was going to.

My CC is setting up a CPA (care plan approach) meeting with me , my psych, my support worker and her. She also helped me fill in my ESA medical form and said if I had to go for an assessment (which I luckily didn't) then she would come with me. She is also the person my GP contacts if she is worried about me, like my GP will be ringing my CC tomorrow to ask her to come and see me asap.
My psych see's me randomly, if I am more unwell then it will be sooner or if my CC feels like I need to see her then she will arrange it. but usuually I see my psychh every few months.

all I will say though is I had to fight for 3 years to get taken on by the CMHT and it was only really because I was sectioned for a second time and the nurses and psych on the ward really pushed for me to be taken on by the CMHT that I was taken on.

[in_BPD_hell]

Hi Thanks both for your replies.
I feel grateful for CMHT 'taking me on!' but as I said I only see a psychiatrist for 10 minutes every few months and then sort of left to the chaos I am creating for myself (unintentionally). In an ideal world I would like a CPN or someone I can ring when I am feeling distressed and then hopefully learn to not be so dependant on them in time. But I feel really lonely. I feel that I cant keep bothering my GP, as she is so busy and keeps telling me she doesn't have a magic wand and cant make me better, but she can pray for me!!! which, for me, isn't very reassuring!

I wish my therapy was sooner, but I know I just have to wait. I have waited 6 months already.

I also have some issues with my current psych as its a locum, and a man who isn't working with me very well. That's my own fault, so I've not been able to tell him how desperate I feel, because with men if I show weakness I feel he will hurt me.. my rational head knows that isn't the case... but my poorly side cant let my guard down with him, like I could do with my proper psych... if that makes sense.

Basically I think I need to have someone I can ring when Im suicidal or severely distressed.

[Wonderland.]

There should always be a duty worker at the CMHT that you can speak to during the week.

Have you been given the number for your local crisis team?

Obviously there is also the Samaritans.

[in_BPD_hell]

Hi. Yes thanks. I have rang the Samaritans once when I was extremely desperate, but wouldn't want it to be a regular thing.

I don't have the number for a duty worker.

I don't seem to have a care co-ordinator either - or is mine the psychiatrist?

I did have the crisis team number but after I rang once they contacted my employer so I've deleted it now!!! which I guess was silly.

[Wonderland.]

If you ring up your CMHT and ask to speak to the duty worker they'll put you through to them. And they should be able to give you the crisis teams number.

Samaritans are there as an option anyway.

Not everyone under the CMHT has a CC, so that might be the case for you.

Remember we are always here, and you can always email the Supporters.

[sherlock holmes]

I'm not sure it's terribly helpful to compare what level of support everyone receives. Treatment differs from area to area and is tailored to each individual person, so two people with the same diagnosis can receive very different support from their CMHT.

Ninix I'm glad you recognise what help you need. As Ames said if you ring the number for your CMHT you can at any time during office hours ask to speak to the duty worker. A duty worker is usually a CPN or social worker who's on call that day and anyone can request to see/speak to them.

As for the crisis/home treatment team you may need a referral to them to be able to contact them. This differs area to area. Ask for their number if you're able to have it, otherwise if you wish to speak to them you'll need to be referred by your GP, the duty worker or through A&E.

You can go to A&E at any time day or night and request to see the psych liaison team who will speak to you.

It might be a good idea to see your GP and tell them you need more support and can they contact your CMHT and request you have a care co-ordinator so you can talk through the support you need and have a regular point of contact.

[in_BPD_hell]

Thanks both - very helpful. Will ring my GP or my cmht (have my psychs secretary's number hopefully she can point me in the right direction)

Sorry but my aim was not trying to compare levels of support as such, as I said I know cmht varies per region and I know the care you receive depends on need. And I understand there are tons of people who have higher need than I do. What I was trying to understand was, is it reasonable for me to ask for extra support?! Asking for help from professionals is massively scary for me. It took me eight years before I could tell my GP I was self harming. I didn't want to build up the courage to ask, and then be told that what I am asking for is unrealistic, as that would set me back a long long long way. When my GP told me there was nothing she could do I couldn't cope and OD'd. So I need to be prepared, so that I can be realistic and keep myself safe. I'm sorry if that sounds stupid. It's hard to explain. I find it hard to explain how desperate I feel. I don't want to say what happened after GP as it sounds manipulative but that's certainly not my intention.

[sherlock holmes]

I would say it is realistic to ask for a care co-ordinator or CPN. Though it's impossible to predict what your CMHT will say, so prepare yourself for bad news just in case.

Can you think of a safety plan for if the CMHT say no? Something to keep you occupied and away from anything you can harm yourself with.

I totally understand the feelings of desperation and abandonment and reacting to those with self destruction. Unfortunately it can be interpreted as manipulation by mental health professionals who don't really understand BPD. I found it's always better to talk about your feelings and that you feel urges to do x,yz as a result of what's happening rather than to react straight away by hurting yourself.

[in_BPD_hell]

Thanks. I agree. I can totally see why it looks like manipulation. I wish I didn't feel like this it act so impulsively.

To keep myself safe I will need to stay with my dad for a few days. I will also need to be off work, I am off in 7 days time so preparing to ask when I'm off.

I hope they see it as a positive step not that I'm being difficult. I just feel I need more professional help as I'm not getting anywhere at the moment.

I will prepare for worst case scenario that they say no. But I hope that they can help me more

[sherlock holmes]

What helps me usually when I feel really intense and desperate about something is to take a few days to write out more rationally how I feel and why the thing I want would benefit me.

That way when you do eventually speak to the CMHT you can more calmly read from your list and not get caught up in your emotions.

It's great that you're going to take time off work and stay with your Dad. Have you got anything nice planned?

[in_BPD_hell]

Good plan I always start crying which doesn't help the situation.

No plans as yet.. Currently just planning to survive each day! I'm struggling a lot at the moment. Things are intense!

[lozza]

thinking of you and hope you are ok

[in_BPD_hell]

I told my GP I was struggling today - she did nothing for me!

[sherlock holmes]

What exactly did she say?

[in_BPD_hell]

I feel brilliant now! It's amazing how my mood has lifted! Feel like I'm all better.. it's fantastic!

So I saw someone new as my one wasn't in.
She asked me my history
Asked to look at my self harm cuts - I initially refused. I found this weird as no-one has ever asked to see but I showed them! Which was not very nice.
She then said my option was to see her again in one week or for me to ring the crisis team. But I don't feel at crisis right now! So I didn't see the point in that. I just felt emotional panicky self harmy not suicidal and I reserve the crisis team is for my suicidal thoughts.
She said she will ask cmht if I should be started on an SSRI - as they've currently said I don't need medication just therapy..
So I guess she did do stuff but it felt like she didn't. It didn't feel like enough!

[Serendipity.]

What would you have liked her to do instead? It sounds like she actually did take you seriously and give you options to move forwards with. I can understand that things have been difficult and you feel like you need more support, but maybe that is something to discuss with the CMHT - there is a limit to what GPs can provide and it does sound like she was quite reasonable.

I'm glad you're feeling better, but do look after yourself. Is there anything you could do that would help you continue to feel better?

[in_BPD_hell]

Hi

I know she was. I was unrealistic. I was just so low this morning that I was unrealistic in what I expected, I just really like my GP and trust them. I don't trust cmht. I find that so tough. So tough. I'm scared to contact cmht.

I don't know what shifted my mood but I feel sooooo much better. I hope it stays this way! I'm soooo full of energy. I love it. I feel so whizzy

[in_BPD_hell]

I don't know how to keep my mood! Any tips?